Moments of Clarity, Moments of Insanity
Disclaimer: Switched At Birth is owned by Lizzy Weiss and ABC Family. No
copyright infringement is meant. I am using the characters for entertainment
purposes only.
Disclaimer: There will be "M" rated themes in later chapters......
#-----------
Chapter 8- episode 10
The morning after my birthday, I woke up with a splitting headache. The
reason for the headache, was a certain strawberry blonde deaf girl who was
sleeping down the hall. I had spent much of the night crying my eyes out.
Daphne likes Emmett, Daphne likes Emmett, Daphne likes Emmett…
I knew I had two choices…
1. Let Emmett know before Daphne had a chance to….
Or
2. Let Daphne tell Emmett herself…
Either way, I knew the end result….
I would lose Emmett.
Once he knew that Daphne liked him, he would kick me to the curb. This has
been his dream, Daphne feeling the same way he does. Did? I don't honestly know
anymore.
What I do know is that I have deep feelings for Emmett, deeper than I had
ever felt with Liam or Ty….
That's because you're in love with Emmett.
I know, it's weird to be in love with someone you've only known for a few
weeks. But, from the beginning, there was a connection, a feeling that I
can't explain. It was like our souls connected and came together. I felt like he
was my other half, my reason for existing.
My soul mate….
What was I going to do?
Maybe I should just breakup with Emmett, and save myself the heartache and
humiliation later….
A little while later, I got a text from Emmett, telling me he was outside, waiting. He never came up the driveway anymore if Daphne was home. Only if he was coming to see her specifically, would he pull into the driveway.
Should I tell him what Daphne told me? I texted back, "BRO"
(translation-Be right out). "Here goes nothing," I muttered to myself.
Walking down the driveway, I spied Emmett sitting on his bike. I never got
tired of seeing him astride it. The bike gave him a "bad boy" look.
How much longer would he be mine? Was he still mine? That
thought made me pause, causing a wave of sadness to envelope me. Maybe Daphne
had already spoken to him. Maybe that was why he was here. To breakup with me?
Emmett got off his bike, waiting for me. I stopped just out of his reach.
Might as well get it over with….
"Hi, Emmett. Daphne is in the main house," I told him flatly. Surprise
flashed on his face.
"I'm here to see you, not her. Why do I care where she is right now?" he
signed and mouthed. Okay, that's a good sign, I hope…
I signed, "Garage…" hoping he would understand I wanted us to go to my
garage. I turned around, heading in that direction. Emmett followed me. Could he
tell something was off?
After we got in the garage, Emmett pulled me into a kiss. I stiffened for a
second, thinking about him doing this with Daphne, before I kissed him back…
the thought made me ill….
"What's wrong?" Emmett signed. Damn it, he noticed me stiffen up. Play it
off…
"Nothing," I responded. "What's going on with you?" He looked confused now.
Emmett waved his hands at me. This was ridicules. I need to ask him…
"Did something happen, Bay? Why are you acting so strange?" Emmett signed and
mouthed.
Again, sadness overwhelmed me. Here goes nothing…
I sat down on my couch. Emmett sat next to me. Taking a deep breathe, I asked
him the question I never wanted to ask…
"Why are you with me?" I saw confusion again.
"Why shouldn't I be with you?" he signed back.
I should just tell him. He'll pick her. I know he will. I need to save my
heart, before it gets stomped on. Lead him toward it…
"I just mean…." I stopped, agonizing over my next words, "would you be
happier with a deaf girl?"
"I'm happy with you," he mouthed and signed. Why are you making this so
hard?
"I know that. I just think it must be hard for you, always having to read
lips. If I could sign as well as Daphne, it would be better," I mouthed slowly.
Smooth, Bay. Real smooth.
Emmett took one of my hands in his. The other he placed along side my cheek.
"You will," he mouthed simply.
"I just feel like I'm making things more difficult for you," Bay said slowly.
Would he think I'm trying to break up with him? Do I want him to think
that?
"Bay, where is this coming from?" Emmett asked. I saw determination on his
face. I can't do this now…
"Never mind. I just realized how stupid this whole thing is. Forget I said
anything," I told him, backpedaling. Thankfully, he changed the subject.
"Daphne and I are doing a fundraiser for Carlton. We are raising money for
school activities. I was hoping your dad would be willing to let us use one of
his carwashes," he signed and mouthed.
I nodded. Dad would definitely want to help out. "I'm sure he'll say yes. He
loves to help the community. I'll ask him today."
"We want to have it next week. Probably Friday or Saturday. Is that too
soon?" Emmett asked.
"It should be okay. Dad has plenty of them to spare," I told him. Then I
remembered... "There's a student art show at Buckner I entered this weekend. I
forgot to tell you. Do you think you might be able to come?"
"I can try. Daphne and I were going to go over the stuff for the fundraiser
this weekend," Emmett replied.
We talked about the pieces I was going to enter and I showed them to him.
Emmett stayed for a few hours before he had to head back home.
This time, when Emmett kissed me goodbye, I kissed him back with no
hesitation. For now, he's still mine. He got on his bike and waved before
driving away.
Thankfully he hadn't asked me if I spoke to Daphne. I prayed he never did….
#------------------------------
I woke up the morning after Bay's birthday with a smile. I was sure by now,
that Bay had told Daphne about us. No more sneaking around. No more hiding.
The thought of it made me giddy.
Checking my phone, I was surprised that Bay still hadn't texted me. Maybe she
was still sleeping. That's okay, I'll be seeing Bay later anyway.
I wanted to talk to her about the fundraiser Daphne and I were working on at
Carlton. I was hoping her dad would be willing to "loan" us one of his car
washes.
Later that day, I pulled up to the Kennish driveway. I sent Bay a text,
letting her know I was waiting. A few seconds later, I got a reply.
"BRO" (translation- Be right out)
A moment or so later, my beautiful girlfriend came into view. I thanked God
everyday that I had someone as perfect as Bay in my life. She was the other half
of me. She completed me. Why did I feel like that?
Because you're in love with Bay….
I know, it's weird being in love with someone that I've only known for a few
weeks. But, I knew, right from the beginning. She was my reason for existing. I
was put on this Earth to be with her…
She's my soul mate…
As Bay approached me, I thought I saw a trace of sadness on her face. But, it
passed so quickly, I could have imagined it. I hopped off my bike so I could
grab her when she got close enough. However, Bay stopped just out of my reach.
"Hi, Emmett. Daphne is in the main house," she told me by way of a greeting.
What the? I'm not here for Daphne…
"I'm here to see you, not her. Why do I care where she is right now?" Okay,
strange way to start a conversation. What the hell was going on?
Bay signed, "Garage…" meaning she wanted us to go to her garage. Okay, sounds
good to me. She turned around, heading in that direction.
I followed after her. Bay's acting weird. Is Bay hiding something? One way to
find out….
After we got in her garage, I pulled her into a kiss. She stiffened for a
second, before she kissed me back…
"What's wrong?" I signed. Something was definitely up. Bay never
stiffened up like that when I kissed her.
"Nothing," she responded. "What's going on with you?" Huh?
I waved my hands at her. This was ridicules. She was acting really strange,
even for her.
"Did something happen, Bay? Why are you acting so strange?" I signed and
mouthed.
Again, there's that sadness on her face again. I know I didn't imagine it
this time.
Bay sat on her couch. I sat next to her. She faced me and said the last thing
I ever expected her to say…
"Why are you with me?" What the hell?
"Why shouldn't I be with you?" I signed back. What was she getting at?
Bay looked thoughtful for a moment. What was going through that head of hers?
"I just mean…." Bay, stopped. "would you be happier with a deaf girl?"
She's joking, right?
"I'm happy with you," I mouthed and signed.
"I know that. I just think it must be hard for you, always having to read
lips. If I could sign as well as Daphne, it would be better," she mouthed
slowly. Aahhh, now I see….
I took one of her hands in mine. The other I placed along side her cheek.
"You will," I mouthed simply.
"I just feel like I'm making things more difficult for you," Bay said slowly.
Is she trying to break up with me?
"Bay, where is this coming from?" I asked. I was getting to the bottom of
this.
"Never mind. I just realized how stupid this whole thing is. Forget I said
anything," Bay backpedaled.
This isn't over. Not by a long shot….
Dropping the subject, I decided to tell her my reason for being here…
"Daphne and I are doing a fundraiser for Carlton. We are raising money for
school activities. I was hoping your dad would be willing to let us use one of
his carwashes," I signed and mouthed.
Bay nodded. "I'm sure he'll say yes. He loves to help the community. I'll ask
him today."
"We want to have it next week. Probably Friday or Saturday. Is that too
soon?" I asked her.
"It should be okay. Dad has plenty of them to spare," she told me. Then she
told me, "There's a student art show at Buckner I entered this weekend. I forgot
to tell you. Do you think you might be able to come?"
"I can try. Daphne and I were going to go over the stuff for the fundraiser
this weekend," I replied.
We talked about what she was going to enter and she showed me the pieces. I
stayed for a few hours before I had to head back home.
This time, when I kissed Bay goodbye, she kissed me back with no hesitation.
I got on my bike and waved before I drove away.
Halfway home, I realized I never did get to the bottom of Bay's strange
behavior. Maybe Mom said something to her after the party last night. Mom was
still there when I dropped Bay back off. Had she gotten to Bay somehow? Made her
doubt our relationship in some way? Maybe I should go back and ask Bay. Would
she tell me?
I also realized I forgot to ask her if she had talked to Daphne. Of course
Bay had. She had no reason not to…..
In the end, I decided to just go home. I needed to start planning the
fundraiser. I would talk to Bay after the fundraiser was over about her
behavior.
#-----------------------
I talked to my father, and just as I suspected, he was more than happy to
loan out a carwash for the fundraiser. I sent Emmett a text, telling him Dad's
answer. His response was "Great, I'll let Daphne know when she comes over."
I wasn't worried about the art show. I knew I had great pieces to display.
What I was worried about was Daphne. When was she going to tell Emmett?
How much time did I have? There was never a question of knowing he would pick
me. I knew better. Daphne was the one he really wanted. I knew my time
with him was limited.
Make it count, Bay. No matter how long you have left with Emmett. Don't go
down without a fight….
The week passed by uneventfully. Emmett was planning their fundraiser, so I
didn't see him very much. I missed him. I wanted as much time as I could get
with him. But, I couldn't hover either.
The morning of the art show, I woke up in a great mood. I had my pieces ready
to go and I couldn't wait to show off my art. The show was suppose to be 4
hours. Apparently, they had a lot of entries.
2 hours in, I noticed a man looking at my art. He was tall and exotic
looking. Not bad to look at either. He seemed very interested in my work, so I
did what any artist would do…I sidled over to talk him up.
"You like?" I asked exotic man.
"It's incredible," he said with a European accent. Okay, even his voice is
hot. "I love the sense of the movement. Reminds me of cave paintings." Is
he an artist too? "Surrealist."
How cool is this man? He figured out my paintings on the first try.
Squueeeellll! "Yeah, that's exactly what I was going for. Surrealism."
The man turned to look at me closer. Flustered, I said, "It's spray paint and
stencil, in case you're interested."
He looked at me with new interest. "Are you Bay? The artist?"
"Yeah," I said. obviously…. "Let me guess. You're a curator from a
gallery in New York? Or Paris?" How awesome would that be?
Smiling, he said, "No, I'm not." Damn!
" A scout looking for the next "Basquiat?" Help me out here… "Because,
I'm also into neo-expressionism, part Puerto Rican, and extremely gifted.
But, anti-heroin. Heroin's bad," I told him straight faced.
"No, I'm not from any gallery. I'm sorry," he told me.
"Bummer!" I really wished he had been. On the plus side though, "Hey! You
like art, though. So, that's cool." Then I noticed him staring at my wrist.
"Wow," he said. What was he looking at?
"Yeah?" I asked him.
"I'm wondering where you got my lucky guitar pick?" Back up, mister!
"Your guitar pick?" Then I really looked at the pick, remembering.
Emmett and I found the guitar pick in Angelo's car…. My eyes widened.
Could it be? "Angelo?" We stared at each other.
"Nice to meet you, sweetheart," Angelo said softly. The truth slammed into
me.
My biological father was standing right here in front of me…and he was happy
to meet me!
Then the apprehension started….
"How did you find me? When did you find out? What are you doing here?"
I asked, starting to panic. Did Regina know he's here? Did she send him?
"I know this is sudden, but I just found out, and I really wanted to see you.
Look at you.." Angelo said, reaching toward me. I backed away, still feeling him
out. No touching!
Angelo could probably sense my hesitance, because he then asked, "Um, how is
Regina and Daphne?" So, Regina hadn't sent him. That made me feel a little
better.
"Their good." What else could I say?
"Are they here? I'd love to see them," Angelo said, looking around. Right,
because they would so want to come to see my art.
"Uh no, their not. I don't think that's such a great idea," I said in a rush.
"You seeing them. I mean, they don't have the fondest memories of you."
"I'm sure you've heard a lot of things about me," he started. Not
really…. "But I hope you can make up your own mind."
"Why did you just show up here? I mean, why didn't you call? This is so not
fair!" God, I sound like a whiny teenager!
I wish Emmett was here…..
Angelo was about to answer me, when Dad walked up to us. Any other time, this
would have bothered me, but not today.
"Hey, sweetie. Everything okay?" he asked, sizing up Angelo. Oh! Can't
tell Dad the truth…
"Yeah," I said. My two dad's continued to stare at each other. "This is a
gallery owner, from downtown," I lied.
"Oh," Dad said, looking a little bit relieved.
"This is- this is my dad, John Kennish," I introduced him to Angelo. Dad
stuck out his hand and Angelo shook it.
"Hi! Gallery owner? That's great!"
"Angelo. Nice to meet you," Angelo returned.
"Nice to meet you. Are you a parent here?" Dad asked. Please say no,
please say no…
"Yes, I am," Angelo stumbled a little. Damn!
"A lot of interesting work, huh? Bay certainly is talented," Dad boosted. I
laughed nervously. "She's working on a piece right now. It's wild. It's like,
uh, tape and spray-"
"Spray paint," I supplied nervously.
"Paint. Spray paint. Yeah, I don't know where she comes up with this stuff?"
Dad finished.
Fortunately, I heard Mom say "Honey?" trying to get Dad's attention. He
looked at her, and she mimed golfing.
"My wife is trying to wrangle me into the celebrity golf tournament, so I
better go do that," Dad told Angelo. Good, this is getting weird! "It's
nice to meet you," he said, holding out his hand again.
"Very nice to meet you, too," Angelo said, returning the handshake.
"I'll see you," Dad told me before going over to join Mom.
"Bye," I said softly. Sighing, I told Angelo, "That was surreal."
He actually smiled. "Look, I'm staying at the Bowman Hotel for the next 3
days. I'd love to see you. But, if you don't want to, I understand." I want
to, but…. "I'm just very happy I got a chance to meet my daughter."
I stood there, frozen. This is what I've wanted. I wanted to find Angelo, and
now….
"Bye," he said quietly, before walking away.
I have to tell Emmett about this. Hell, I have to Daphne about this
too!
My life just got a lot more complicated…
#-----------------------
The morning of Bay's art show, Daphne came over. Would she say anything about
Bay and I? I was planning on going over the fundraiser stuff with Daphne, and
then if I had time, I was going to head over to the art show and support Bay.
Daphne came in carrying a folder. Apparently, she had a few ideas as well.
Daphne was signing very animatedly the whole way up to my bedroom. I was quite
happy. Daphne must have taken the news of Bay and I quite well, for her to be
this happy. Finally, something goes our way….
As I opened my bedroom door, Daphne was talking about the fundraiser.
"I want this to be the biggest fundraiser Carlton's ever had. I want to break
records!" she said gleefully.
"It's not a competition," I told her. We don't need to toss every one else in
the dirt. On second thought, "Oh, wait. You're a Kennish. Everything is a
competition," I said with a smile. Daphne just laughed. Then she reached for the
folder she had just tossed on my bed.
"We could do graphic T-shirts, or a 5K run…" she said, showing me the
drawings she had created. Daphne was talented, but not nearly as much as my Bay.
I did like her ideas, but….
"These are cool…but I already spoke with John. He said we could do a car wash
next weekend and all proceeds go to the school," I told her happily. I thought
Daphne would be pleased. I wasn't expecting her to get upset.
"You spoke to John?" she asked, her face questioning. "When?"
Now I was confused. "Actually, I spoke to Bay. She worked it out."
Daphne looked annoyed. "You and I are organizing this fundraiser. Why would
you talk to Bay?" Suddenly, something over my shoulder caught Daphne's eye. She
looked confused before she walked toward my wall. My Bay wall…
She stared at my wall for a moment. Finally she turned and faced me. Why does
she not look happy right now? Didn't Bay…
"What's going on?" Daphne asked, confusion clearly written on her face.
Bay hadn't told her yet?
Wanting to confirm my suspicion, I asked Daphne, "Bay didn't talk to you?"
From the look on her face, I'm guessing NO! Which begs the question, why?
"You said nothing was going on." Daphne was hurt, I could see it.
"It wasn't then," I told her honestly. At least till the next
day…
Then Daphne got angry. "You said if Brooklyn Decker came down from the
mountain of supermodels, you wouldn't date her." I only told you that to get you
off my back! "You said you'd wait for a deaf girl."
Now, I was wishing I hadn't told her that to start with. Yes, I had wanted a
deaf girl before. I had wanted Daphne for years. But, she didn't see me that
way, so I finally moved on.
"I did wait. I didn't want to wait anymore." Bay came into my life. I wasn't
passing up that chance.
"Why are you doing this?" Daphne questioned. Why am I doing this? What the
hell?
"What do you mean?" I asked. Daphne just stared at me. "I LIKE HER!" Got a
problem with that?
Daphne got a disbelieving look. Then she ranted. "I've known you my entire
life. You've never been interested in a hearing girl?" Not before. "And
now Bay? Of all people?"
Seriously! What, does Bay have the plague or something? Why shouldn't I be
with her? I was suddenly reminded of my conversation earlier in the week with
Bay. Had she tried to tell Daphne, and got this response? Now I was mad.
"Yes. Bay of all people," I told her, irritated.
Daphne shook her head before telling me, "No." You think you're dictating
my relationship for me? I don't think so….
Wanting to put an end to this, I told her, "I'm not asking your permission."
End of Discussion!
Daphne was angry. I didn't care. Bay was my choice. Being my best friend only
gave her so much leeway. And she was seriously pushing the boundary line of our
friendship.
Daphne and I stared each other down. Finally, she shook her head, grabbed her
bag and ran out the door.
Well, that just went SOOOOOOOOO well…..
#-----------------------------
I decided that Daphne needed to know before anyone else that Angelo was here,
in town. At the moment, I didn't care about her feelings for Emmett, I just
needed her to hear it before Angelo dropped in on her and Regina unexpectedly. I
figured I could be that nice. Just this once.
After school, I raced home as quick as I could. Emmett hadn't shown up at the
showing. I wasn't worried. They probably just got caught up in planning the
fundraiser. Pulling up to the house, I saw Daphne sitting outside, doing
homework. Perfect! I jumped out of my car, racing toward her.
Daphne looked up at my approach. "Hey. I was just coming to talk to you," I
started. Why does she look angry?
"How come you didn't tell me you were dating Emmett?" Daphne replied, ice in
her voice. Oh, shit…
I'm sure my face mirrored my surprise. I realized Emmett must have said
something to her this morning, not knowing I hadn't told her yet. Think
fast…
Apologetically, I said, "I'm sorry. There wasn't exactly a good time to tell
you. But, I should have." When was I suppose to tell you? When you declared
your feelings for my boyfriend?
"You don't even know him," Daphne countered. She was glaring daggers now.
"That's why we're dating. We're getting to know each other," I told her. How
else do you get to know someone?
"You will never know him," she told me rudely. Okay, now I'm pissed.
Is this what she did to Emmett?
I quipped about vampires and humans dating. If they could, Emmett and I
certainly could. Daphne wasn't amused.
Daphne stood up and stalked toward me. Getting in my face, she said harshly,
"He's my best friend. You can't find some one else? Really?" If he was
really your best friend, you would honor his choices, not bash them down!
I fought back. "You decided you liked him off a T-shirt. And the only reason
that you realized it, is because your life is falling apart, and you're looking
for someone to cling to." Take that, bi-atch!
"I should have never told you anything," Daphne stated.
I was too pissed off to care, though. And, I wasn't finished with her yet,
either.
"And what happens when things go back to normal? Is he just gonna turn into
your little lap dog again? Is that really what you want for him?" I said
angrily. Let her see just how pissed I am right now!
"Is that what you came to tell me?" she asked, just as angry. Screw you,
if you think I'll tell you anything now! You can rot in HELL!
"Yeah, that was it," I told her. I pushed around her and headed for my room.
On the way, I sent a text to Emmett.
"Need to talk to you. Are you busy?"
A moment later, I got a response. "Nope. I'm all yours!"
#--------------------------------
After Daphne stormed away, I contemplated texting Bay to find out why she
hadn't said anything to Daphne. Looking at the clock, I realized she was still
at the art showing. Should I go? I finally decided to just stay home. I
had already seen Bay's pieces, anyway. I would make it up to her later.
I was still angry at Daphne. How dare she try to tell me I couldn't date Bay!
What gave her the right to try and dictate my choices? Just because she bailed
out of her relationship with "The Loser" doesn't mean I plan on doing the same
with Bay! What the hell was her freaking problem?
I was ready to hop on my bike and go take pictures to blow off steam, when my
phone vibrated. Checking the caller ID, I smiled when I saw Bay's name. Eagerly,
I opened the message.
"Need to talk to you. Are you busy?"
Never too busy to spend time with my girlfriend. Quickly, I typed in, "Nope.
I'm all yours!" and hit send.
After the Daphne fiasco, I really needed to see my beautiful girlfriend.
Hopefully, also, I would find out why she hadn't told Daphne about us….
#-----------------------------
I picked Emmett up at his house. Emmett said he was hungry, so we stopped at
a fast food joint and I ordered his food from the drive-thru. All the way to the
water park, I was trying to figure out how to ask Emmett about his conversation
with Daphne. I was also dying to tell him about Angelo's surprise visit.
Once we got to the water park, I pulled to a stop by the fountain. Emmett
decided to sit on the hood and eat his lunch. I wandered back and forth, trying
to work up my courage.
Emmett, however, beat me to the punch. Waving his hand, he gestured for me to
come closer. Here it comes…
"Why didn't you tell Daphne about us?" he signed. I sighed. Gee, I don't
know. Maybe because she suddenly decided to declare her love for you, just as I
was going to tell her! Nope, can't tell him that.
"I couldn't think of a good way to tell her," I lied through my teeth. Emmett
stared at me. Could he tell I was lying? Shit, I forgot how good he is at
reading body language.
Then he surprised me. "She was pretty upset when she saw the pictures on my
wall of you." Pictures of me? What about his Daphne wall?
"She didn't take it well, then?" I asked him.
Emmett looked thoughtful. Finally, he shook his head.
"How bad was it?" I dared question. The silence I received told me everything
I needed to know. She had been furious! And why wouldn't she have been?
"Doesn't matter. It's out in the open now. No more hiding," Emmett mouthed
and signed happily. "So, what did you want to tell me about?"
Taking a deep breath, I signed and said, "Angelo's here."
Emmett's eyebrows raised into his forehead. "Here? In KC?" he signed.
"Yeah. He showed up at the art show. The only reason I knew it was him, was
because he commented on the guitar pick," I told him as slowly as I could,
signing quite a bit.
"Did he say what he wanted? Why is he just coming around now? Is he staying?"
Emmett mouthed and signed quickly. Holy…one question at a time!
"Not really. I don't know. Again, I don't know. He was happy he got to meet
me," I told him slowly.
"Okay, tell me everything. From the beginning," Emmett signed.
Taking another deep breath, I repeated everything that had happened. From
seeing Angelo looking at my paintings to the moment he walked away. It took a
little while. Emmett just sat patiently, not interrupting. Then I got irritated.
I mean, who does Angelo really think he is? So, I ranted. And, I paced, signing
for Emmett's benefit.
"He just waltzes in, without warning, tells me he's here for 72 hours, and
then just expects me to drop everything and get to know him. Risk pissing off
Daphne and my parents, ha ha, all 3 of them!" Emmett is watching me, calmly
eating his meatball sandwich. Must be nice….
Finally, I faced Emmett directly. Deflating a bit, I tell him, "I want to be
mad. But, I'm not. I mean, he's never done anything to me. How do I know what's
true, unless, I hear what he has to say?" I had signed almost all of it
and was very proud of myself. I realized I was fed up with the whole situation.
I was surprised that Angelo was here, to say the least. Maybe, for once, he
would be on my side instead of Daphne.
I was tired of sneaking around. I was proud to be with Emmett, and I wanted
the world to know it. I was tired of everyone being on Daphne's side. Even
Emmett still had to choose sides between his girlfriend and best friend!
Emmett, his mouth full, signs back, "You don't." Show off!
"How do you sign and eat at the same time?" I ask him, curious.
Emmett chuckles. "Lots of practice," he signs. Really?
Playfully, I grabbed his sandwich away. Watching him eat was starting to make
me hungry. I took a bite to see how he'd react. He just smiled and took a drink
of his soda. Does nothing bother him?
I'm sorry Daphne got mad at you," I told him. She should take it out on me,
not Emmett.
Emmett shrugged it off. "I don't care. She has no right to judge me," he
signed and mouthed.
"Okay," I started, handing him his sandwich back. "Things have been kind of
sucky for her lately, and it can't be easy for her, that we're together. And, I
just- I feel kinda bad." Why the hell was I defending her? She's trying to
steal my boyfriend!
Apparently, Emmett was done talking about Daphne. He signed something about,
"What are you going to do about…" but I didn't catch the ending. I looked at him
with confusion. Then he signed, "Father." Okay?
"Father….A…N…" Oh, duh! "Angelo? Angelo? Oh, what am I going to do about
Angelo?"
He nodded and waited. What was I going to do?
"I don't know. Maybe I'm better off just letting this one go," I told him and
signed. He shook his head.
"We both know that's not going to happen," he signed. He knows me too
well…
"Emmett, you think I go looking for trouble?" I asked. Did I really want his
answer?
"He is your father. You have to go," he signed. I hate when he's right!
I decided Emmett was right. I owed it to myself to at least see what Angelo
has to say. I figured now was as good a time as any. I dropped Emmett at the
carwash so he and Daphne could start getting things together for the fundraiser.
Just before he got out of the car, Emmett signed, "If you need me, text me.
If anything happens, I'll be there as fast as I can."
"I will," I promised him. As Emmett walked away, I thought, "Here we go.."
#----------------------
Bay picked me up at my house. I hadn't had lunch, so I told Bay I was hungry.
We stopped at a fast food joint and she ordered at the drive-thru. All the way
to the water park, I was trying to figure out how to ask Bay why she hadn't
spoken to Daphne.
At the water park, Bay pulled up by the fountain. I sat on the hood to eat my
lunch. I wasn't getting Bay's nice new car dirty with meatball sauce. Bay paced
in front of me. Something was on her mind, that was obvious. I waved my hand to
gain her attention. When she looked, I gestured for her to come closer.
"Why didn't you tell Daphne about us?" I signed. I saw Bay sigh. I really
wasn't mad, merely curious. There had to be a reason…
"I couldn't think of a good way to tell her," She told me. I stared at her.
Her body language told me she was on edge, but there was something else there
too. Fear? Why would Bay be afraid to tell me something?
I signed, "She was pretty upset when she saw the pictures on my wall of you."
Bay's eyes widened. Shit, I never got to show her the new pictures on my wall.
She hasn't been back in my room..
"She didn't take it well, then?" Bay asked me. You could say that…..
Deciding silence was the best answer, I shook my head.
"How bad was it?" Bay questioned. I stared at her, telling her with my eyes
she really didn't want to know. Unconsciously, Bay nodded her head at my
silence.
"Doesn't matter. It's out in the open now. No more hiding," I mouthed and
signed happily. "So, what did you want to tell me about?" Because, obviously
that wasn't it..
Bay took a deep breath before signing and saying, "Angelo's here."
Angelo? Her father! What the hell! "Here? In KC?" I questioned.
"Yeah. He showed up at the art show. The only reason I knew it was him, was
because he commented on the guitar pick," She told me slowly, signing quite a
bit.
Questions immediately flooded my mind. Signing quickly, I fired them off.
"Did he say what he wanted? Why is he just coming around now? Is he staying?"
"Not really. I don't know. Again, I don't know. He was happy he got to meet
me," She told me slowly. I was impressed she had caught everything I had signed.
"Okay, tell me everything. From the beginning," I signed. I need to know
if he is a threat to Bay..
Taking another deep breath, Bay told me everything from the beginning. From
seeing Angelo looking at her paintings to the moment he walked away. It took her
a little while. I sat patiently, not interrupting. Then, she started to pace,
signing for my benefit. I could see the irritation coming off her.
"He just waltzes in, without warning, tells me he's here for 72 hours, and
then just expects me to drop everything and get to know him. Risk pissing off
Daphne and my parents, ha ha, all 3 of them!" She rants. I watch her carefully,
making sure I catch enough to understand. I think I caught everything. She is
talking fast, but her signs make up the difference. Just let her get it off
her chest..
Finally, she stopped pacing and faced me. Deflating a bit, she tells me,
still signing, "I want to be mad. But, I'm not. I mean, he's never done anything
to me. How do I know what's true, unless, I hear what he has to say?"
What could I tell her? He's her father. She has heard some stuff from Regina
about him and not much else. I can't fill in the blanks, because I know less
than she does. So I signed back, "You don't."
Bay scoffed. "How do you sign and eat at the same time?"
I chuckled. That should be obvious…."Lots of practice." I gloated a
little.
Bay grabbed my sandwich away and took a bite of it. Shrugging, I smiled and
took a drink of my soda.
I'm sorry Daphne got mad at you," she told me. Doesn't matter. Her issue
isn't my problem.
Shrugging it off, I signed and mouthed, "I don't care. She has no right to
judge me."
"Okay," Bay said, handing me the sandwich back. "Things have been kind of
sucky for her lately, and it can't be easy for her, that we're together. And, I
just- I feel kinda bad." Why the hell was she defending her?
I was done talking about Daphne. I asked instead, "What are you going to do
about Angelo?" Bay looked at me, confused. So I signed, "Father."
"Father," Bay repeated. I finger spelled "A…N…G" Before Bay said, "Angelo?
Angelo? Oh, what am I going to do about Angelo?"
I nodded and waited.
"I don't know. Maybe I'm better off just letting this one go," She told me,
signing as well. I shook my head. I knew her better than that.
"We both know that's not going to happen," I signed. Bay's eyebrows
went up.
"Emmett, you think I go looking for trouble?" she asked.
"He is your father. You have to go," I signed. I knew she would never be
happy unless she found out for herself.
Bay decided I was right. She decided to go see Angelo at his hotel. Bay
dropped me at the carwash so Daphne and I could start getting things together
for the fundraiser.
Just before I got out of the car, I signed, "If you need me, text me. If
anything happens, I'll be there as fast as I can."
"I will," she promised. As I walked away, I thought, "Here we go.."
#----------------------
When I got to the hotel, I took some calming breaths. I asked at the front
desk which room Angelo was staying in, and they informed me that he was in the
dining room. Okay, maybe that was better. One on one would just be too weird
right now.
I saw him sitting at a table toward the middle. Good. I approached Angelo
slowly. He looked up and saw me. Smiling, he stood and waited for me.
"You've got 15 minutes," I told him. He nodded and we sat down.
"What do you want to know? I am an open book," Angelo told me.
"How did you know where I was?" I asked the question that was most prominent
in my mind.
"I was in Chicago, on the train after work, looking for something to read,"
he told me. "Someone had left a paper. There it was, "Switched At Birth." I
nearly died. My girls…you. I mean her…"
"It gets confusing," I said cutting him off. Next question. "Okay, so what am
I again exactly? Italian?"
"Italian, French, some Algerian," he said.
"Algerian?" I said, impressed.
"Yeah," he agreed.
"Whoa, so like, I'm Arab? Cool!" I said. I was way more out there than
Daphne!
"We're a little bit of everything," Angelo told me, smiling.
I threw out some French to show him how well I could do. He started speaking
rapid fire French. Holy…!
"Whoa, whoa, whoa….High School French. High School French!" I told him.
"You'll come with me to Paris this Summer? Meet your grandparents, your
cousins. And, Italy…the art in Italy. You are going to love it," he told me
confidently.
I couldn't believe it. He had just met me, and he was already accepting me! I
was so excited, but at the same time….
"Let's just hold on a second," I told him, trying to be realistic.
"I'm just excited. I don't want to waste anymore time," Angelo stated.
I feel the same way…
"You know, I tried calling your mother, but her number was disconnected," he
told me.
"Uh, she and Daphne and Adrianna, they live in our guest house now," I filled
in.
"Adrianna too? Wow, they didn't talk back then," Angelo said, surprise
evident in his voice.
"She's sober. Regina," I told him, wondering if it was the right thing to
say.
"No kidding," Angelo said, shocked.
"So, what happened there? With you and Regina?" I asked, unsure of if I
really wanted to know or not.
"There's too much to tell you in 15 minutes. I need time with you. Real
time," he said.
He wants me! "I want that too," I assured him. "But, I can't do this
in secret. I can't hide it from my parents."
"However you want to do it, we'll do it," Angelo agreed.
Maybe this would work out after all…
#---------------------------
John was waiting when Bay dropped me off. He didn't see me get out of the
car, which I was glad about. As soon as he saw me, he started telling me about
what was going to happen with the cars. How they would go in, and come down the
ramp. He was trying to sign all this as well. I actually was shocked at how well
he was doing. But, also, a lot of it was more charades than anything else.
After he had explained everything, I asked John if there would be a sign for
Carlton. John looked very confused and mimicked me, trying to figure out what I
had signed.
Frustrated, I kept repeating "sign" but John just wasn't getting it. Finally,
he pulled Daphne over.
"I want to know if there will be a sign for Carlton?" I told her. She
repeated it to John.
"A sign?" he asked. I nodded. Finally….geez. "I got a banner, coming
tomorrow," he signed "tomorrow."
"Tomorrow?" I repeated and gave him thumbs up. Good to know.
He said something else, but I only caught the part where he told me to fill
Daphne in. He waved and walked away.
Facing Daphne, I started to tell her what John and I had talked about, but
she cut me off, saying "-dry the cars. I got it," before walking away.
WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?
#-----------------------------------
Angelo and I talked for a while longer. He told me about some of his
childhood, and about family members I had obviously never met.
I told him about my childhood. I didn't mention Emmett to him. I wasn't ready
to share that information just yet. I wasn't sure exactly how he would respond
to my boyfriend being deaf.
Otherwise, I found Angelo very easy to talk to, and I loved his sense of
humor. He knew some funny jokes.
Finally, I told him I wanted to take him home to "officially" meet my
parents. He was all for it, so we hopped in my car.
Please, please, PLEASE….let this go well….
#--------------------------------
What the hell was Daphne's problem now? She had been acting weird all day.
Was she still pissed off about Bay and I being together? Was Daphne really that
childish? Either way, I really didn't care. It was in the open and I was glad. I
could finally be with my girlfriend without second guessing my every move,
worried Daphne or someone else would see us. I knew Daphne was hurt that I
hadn't said anything before now, but really, did it matter that much anymore?
Sure, Bay and I had our "moments." Communication was still a big thing, but
Bay's signing was improving every day. The rate she was going, she would be
fluent in ASL in a few months. She was that dedicated to learning. Now, if only
my mother would give Bay more of a chance….
I saw Daphne by the table we had set up to collect the money. Perfect! She is
writing on her clipboard. I grabbed some stuff and walked over. Now to find out
what Daphne's issue is….
Daphne looks up at my approach and then looks back down at the clipboard
again, basically trying to ignore me. I got her attention again. She looked at
me, irritation on her face.
"Are you honestly mad at me?" I sign.
"No. I'm sorry. Forget it." she signs back dismissively. She turns to walk
away. I grabbed her hand, and pulled her toward the carwash. Time to air the
laundry..
Standing in front of her, I ask, "Tell me what it is? Is it really because
she is not deaf? Or is it because she's…her? I don't want things weird between
us."
This had to be about Bay. It's the only thing that makes any sense. If I
didn't know better, I would swear Daphne was…jealous. Why on Earth would she be
jealous, though?
"I'll get over it! Don't worry." she tells me, looking frustrated. Is that
hurt on her face?
"Tell me." I ask imploringly. I'm getting to the bottom of this one way or
another. I will have the truth! She looks at me with ….fear? Huh?
What she said next, I could honestly say I wasn't prepared for it.
"I…" she starts. Breaking off, she blushes slightly.
I stare at her, willing her to finish.
"I started to think maybe you and me…." she hesitates again. Say WHAT?
Is she freaking serious? Why the hell is this happening now? Now that I moved
on and found Bay, Daphne decides that NOW she likes me…. Holy
hell!
Irritated, I shake my head sharply, telling her, "Don't!" She is not ruining
what I have with Bay!
Apparently, she didn't get the hint. "Even before I knew about you and Bay. I
swear it's not to take you away from her."
UH-HUH! SURE IT ISN'T! Why do I not believe that?
I decide to let her have it. "How can you do this to me?" Why did she have to
pick right NOW to tell me this? Why couldn't it have been 8 years ago, or hell,
even 6 months ago, before I knew Bay even existed?
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything." YA THINK?
By now, I am full out angry! So, I blow up at her. "I've been waiting for you
for 8 years. You had to know that! 8 YEARS!"
At the same time, Daphne is trying to defend herself. "I wish I had realized
it before now, but it took this whole thing happening for me to realize…"
"I've listened as you talked about all those other guys…"
"you're the only one who gets me."
She can't be serious! "So, I'm just some security blanket?"
"I don't have to read lips or teach signs….we know everything about each
other."
I repeat, "So, I'm just some security blanket?" Was I just comfortable to
her? Is that where this is coming from?
"NO! It's our sense of humor, our history." She looks hurt now. "I'm
sorry if this is bad timing but it'd be dishonest to hide it from you."
Why am I leaning toward her? STOP!
"Wouldn't it?" she finishes.
I stare at her for a second. 8 years of feelings boiled to the surface. I
feel her lips under mine. Did I kiss her or did she kiss me? I didn't
know. All I knew was that I have dreamed of this moment for 8 long years. To
finally have Daphne's lips against mine. To feel her in my arms. This is what
you've wanted. It's here, laid out in front of you. Take it!
Suddenly, Bay pops into my head. I break the kiss. As I stare at Daphne, I
realize that I just basically cheated on my girlfriend. Kissing Daphne was
unforgivable. I can't lead Daphne on. Bay is the one who holds my heart now. The
girl I'm falling in love with. Why did I do that? What the hell is the matter
with me?
Pulling back, I slowly shake my head. Daphne's face is confused.
Firmly, I tell her, "I'm with Bay!" and walk away. What the hell was I
just thinking?
#--------------------------------
I pulled up to my house. Angelo got out, clearly impressed. As we walked
toward the Kitchen door, Angelo said, "This place is incredible!"
"Yeah, if you like overrated everything," I muttered. "Okay," I said,
returning my voice to normal, "I'm gonna go inside and tell my parents I invited
you for dinner. That's your cue to come in," I told Angelo. He nodded and waited
by the door. Now if my nerves would just calm down..
Taking a deep breath, I headed inside. My parents were talking about the art
show. Good, I think…
Dad saw me and said, "Hey, honey!"
I waved back and said hesitantly, Hey, guys? Uh- I invited someone for
dinner." My parents looked expectant.
Angelo came in on his cue, smiling. "Hi," he said softly.
Mom flushed and took off the apron she was wearing. "Ha ha, hello!" she said
warmly.
Dad said, "Hi again," to Angelo as well.
I realized Mom hadn't yet met Angelo, so I said, "Mom? This is Angelo
Sorrento."
Angelo took over. "It's so nice to finally meet you. You've done an
incredible job, both of you." Uh-oh!
Dad looked suspicious. Mom was too, but she smiled and said, "Well, thank
you!" A beat later, she said, "I'm sorry. Who are you again?"
Angelo looked at me, confused. Yep, did I forget to mention they have NO
idea who you are?
Moment of truth…. This could go good or bad.
Please let it go good!
Stealing myself for the worst, and hoping it doesn't happen, I said, "Mom,
Dad, This is my father."
Both of my parents were shocked. I didn't blame them. I did kinda drop it on
them unexpectedly. Then, Dad went into full out parent mode.
"What are you doing here?" he asked, his voice tight. Oh no….
"I came to meet Bay," Angelo told him honestly.
"No, I mean here. At our house?" Dad was angry now.
Time to step in. "Well, Angelo was at my art show and.." I started, but Dad
cut me off.
"Sweetie, I understand," he told me before going after Angelo again. "And by
the way, what the hell was that?
Now, mom was really confused. "Wait, you've met him before?"
"Yeah, he said he was some art guy," Dad told her.
Suffice to say, it went down hill fast after that. Mom and Dad were pounding
Angelo with questions. Angelo tried to answer everything. Dad accused Angelo of
lying to his face about who he was. Then I stepped in again.
I told my parents I hadn't been ready to introduce him yet. At the same time,
Angelo was saying he didn't want to cause any trouble.
Dad told me to go to my room. I told him no I wouldn't. Then he told Angelo
to leave. That we would go through "proper channels." I can't believe
this…..I NEED EMMETT NOW!
Angelo tried to tell Dad he didn't need permission to see his own daughter,
but Dad was way past being reasonable. He was in full out "destroyer" mode. Dad
told him he needed to get out.
We argued some more before Angelo asked Dad how he would feel if he just
found out he had a daughter.
Dad's response…. "I did just find out." Great. And now we are back to
Daphne again…. Wonderful.
Angelo tried to reason with Dad, but that wasn't working either. And then
came the curve ball….
Angrily, Dad said to Angelo, "You are not welcome in this house. You are not
welcome in Bay's life. You have nothing to do with her!"
"Dad, he's the reason I exist," I said quietly, suddenly feeling very small.
And so, we were at a standstill.
And guess who showed up at the kitchen door….. Daphne.
Mom tried to get her to leave, but of course, she wouldn't. Daphne kept
asking who Angelo was. Mom wouldn't tell her. Angelo wanted to talk to her as
well, but Dad stepped in again, telling Angelo to leave.
Finally, rather shrilly, Daphne said, "Will someone please answer me? Who is
this?"
Realizing neither parent was going to give her an answer, I signed, "Our
father."
Daphne's eyes widened. Her jaw dropped in shock. She stared at Angelo for a
minute before she raced back out the door.
Dad and Angelo got into another argument, this time about Daphne. Suddenly,
she reappeared, saying "I want to hear it."
Angelo tried talking to Daphne. He told her he didn't know what Regina had
told her, but that the reasons why he left weren't simple. He told her how sorry
he was that he left, and that he was here now to get to know her, and he hoped
he could make it up to her.
Daphne stared at him. I was getting the strong feeling she hadn't understood
what he had said to her. I knew I was right when Angelo said, "You don't
understand a word I'm saying, do you?"
"No, I don't," Daphne said plainly before running toward the guest house.
I can't believe all of that just happened! What the hell was I suppose to
do now?
I ran to my room, slamming the door.
"SOS!" I typed on my phone. But I hesitated on hitting the send button.
Emmett is busy dealing with the carwash. He doesn't need my drama right
now. I cleared my phone and sat on my bed.
This was the worst day of my life…..
#-------------------------------
Later that day, I was back at Carlton getting ready to leave for the day. I'm
still pissed about the whole kiss with Daphne. Should I tell Bay? That
would create a problem, I was sure of it. Bay would undoubtedly get pissed. More
than likely, she would go after Daphne. Would she break up with me?
The truth was, I wasn't sure who initiated the kiss to start with. Was Daphne
the one at fault? Or, was I the one to blame? I was starting to get a headache.
For now, it was best to keep it from Bay. I knew she would ask questions I
didn't want to answer. It's best to keep her in the dark for now….
Out of my peripheral, I saw someone walking toward me. Looking up, I realize
it's Toby and Wilkie coming toward me. What the hell are these two yahoo's doing
at my school?
"Hey, buddy!" says Wilkie.
"Hey, man!" says Toby.
I look around me. They do remember I'm deaf, right?
Over exaggerating my signs, I ask, "Are you guys lost?"
"Yes." says Toby. Charades isn't your game, is it?
"Or no." he continues. Apparently not.
"We're here to see you man." Toby points at me. Kinda got that figured out.
"So, What's up?" I over sign again. Just go away, would you….
"How good is he at reading lips?" Wilkie asks Toby. Sure , insult my
intelligence. That'll win points. I glare at him.
Toby sighs. "Good enough to know you are talking about him right now."
Someone's on the ball. My respect goes up a notch.
I stop watching Tweedle-dee and Tweedle-dum and go back to getting my
backpack in order. From the corner of my eye, I see Toby strumming an invisible
guitar. Hmmmmm….
Now I start paying more attention…
"Saint Louis. And um, we got in using a tape that was made from the
fundraiser that night. Where you played," he says beating imaginary drums. Dude,
wrong rhythm.
"And we're going. We want you to come with us." Toby finished.
"Groupies. Free beer. Road trip. What do ya say?" puts in Wilkie. Jackass…
Did I really want to hang around these 2 yahoo's for 2 to 3 days? Was it
really worth my time?
"Not interested." I sign. Getting on my bike, I rev the engine and take off.
I'll have to tell Bay about the visit I got from her brother.
#--------------------------------
Sitting on my bed, I fumed. How could my parents do that? How could they
treat me like I was a child? I was staring at the picture that Daphne had given
me, the one of a pregnant Regina. Now that I had met Angelo, I was starting to
have a clearer picture of where I come from. That side of me was no longer such
a mystery.
And my parents are trying to take that away from me!
Mom knocked on my now open door. "Can I come in?" she asked softly. Did I
want her too?
"I can't believe you did that," I told her point blank.
Mom had the grace to look embarrassed. "Wait a minute. We are not saying you
can't see him." Really! Sure sounded that way downstairs! "But, there are
right and wrong ways to initiate contact. And that, was totally disrespectful to
me and Dad."
How else was I suppose to do it? Write it on a freaking banner and fly it
over the house?
"Mom, this isn't about you. It's about me." Did you forget that?
"Honey, it's not that simple," Mom said, trying to reason. "We have to
protect you." From my father!
Time for hard facts. Standing up, I stood in front of Mom. "Mom, my entire
life was thrown off course when I was 5 hours old! Everything about me is messed
up." I felt the tears welling and fought to keep them from falling.
"That is not true," Mom denied.
"Yes it is. You know it is," I told her. "There is this whole other me that I
think about every single day. Who was I suppose to be? And, whether you like it
or not, Angelo Sorrento is key to that answer. And, no matter what you or Dad
do, it's not going to stop me from wanting to find out more about him." I knew I
had gotten through to Mom when the tears started.
"Okay," she said simply. Running her hand down my face, she repeated, "okay."
Score 1 for me.
"Can you talk to Dad? And, get him to back off?" I implored. I really needed
someone on my side right now.
"Okay, I'll talk to him. I promise," Mom said, before pulling me into a hug.
After Mom left, I got a text from Emmett. "Busy? Need to talk to you."
"Come on over. Meet me in studio," I sent back.
"Give me 10 minutes. B right over."
Smiling, I headed to my studio. 10 minutes later, I heard a knock before the
door opened and Emmett stepped through. I immediately went up to him and threw
my arms around him. Emmett returned the hug, but didn't kiss me like he usually
did. I thought that was odd, but made no comment.
We sat on the couch. Emmett signed and mouthed, "I had visitors at Carlton
today."
I cocked an eyebrow. I wondered how long it would take them. "Was it
Toby and Wilkie by chance?"
"Yes. They want me to drum at something in St. Louis. Know about it?" he
signed and mouthed slowly.
Know about it? It's all Toby has been talking about for the last few
days. I was sick of hearing about it, truth be told. But, I wasn't going to
ignore Emmett's question.
"It's a festival called "East West Fest." Toby and Wilkie are opening for
"Cold War Kids" but they don't have a drummer. That's why they want you." I told
him slowly, making sure he caught it all.
"I told him I wasn't interested. I don't really hang out with many hearing
people. And, no offense, your brother is not my favorite person in the world,"
Emmett signed and mouthed slowly as well.
"It's okay. I understand," I told him. I couldn't blame him. After the whole
gambling fiasco, and the bruises that Toby had left on my arm, I was surprised
Emmett had even heard Toby out.
We talked for awhile longer. Emmett was not as affectionate as normal. If
fact, he seemed on edge about something. Should I ask?
In the end, I figured if Emmett wanted to talk about what was on his mind, he
would tell me when he was ready.
Emmett took off just before dinner time. He had a big day tomorrow at the
fundraiser. He was happy when I told him I would be there helping out.
Emmett was standing by my studio door getting ready to leave, when Daphne
came down from the guest house. They locked eyes and she looked away, pain on
her face. She can't still be mad that he and I are together?
Emmett kissed me briefly and took off toward his bike. When I got back in the
house, Daphne glared at me. But, there was something else there too. She
looked….guilty.
What on Earth could she feel guilty about? Deciding not to dwell on
it, I instead focused on the fundraiser that would be happening tomorrow.
#----------------------------
After I got home, I sent a text to Bay. "Busy? Need to talk to you."
"Come on over. Meet me in studio," was what I got back.
"Give me 10 minutes. B right over." I wanted to change first.
I got to Bay's house and parked toward the end of the driveway. As I made my
way up the driveway, I looked around for Daphne. Not seeing her, I breathed a
sigh of relief. I was not ready to face her after what had happened this
morning. I was still pissed at myself for doing that. How would I ever get
the nerve up to tell Bay?
Reaching Bay's studio, I knocked before I opened the door and stepped
through. Bay immediately came up to me and threw her arms around me. I returned
the hug, but couldn't kiss her like I always did. I couldn't kiss Bay after I
had kissed Daphne no more than a few hours ago. Bay IS your girlfriend! I
felt like I had betrayed her. The guilt was eating at me.
We sat on the couch. I signed and mouthed, "I had visitors at Carlton today."
Bay cocked an eyebrow. Ah, so she knew something about it…."Was it Toby and
Wilkie by chance?"
"Yes. They want me to drum at something in St. Louis. Know about it?" I
signed and mouthed slowly.
The look on her face said she knew more about it than she probably wanted to.
"It's a festival called "East West Fest." Toby and Wilkie are opening for
"Cold War Kids" but they don't have a drummer. That's why they want you," she
told me slowly, probably making sure I got it all.
"I told him I wasn't interested. I don't really hang out with many hearing
people. And, no offense, your brother is not my favorite person in the world," I
signed and mouthed slowly as well. Please don't take offense to that!
"It's okay. I understand," Bay told me. After the whole gambling fiasco, and
the bruises that Toby had left on her arm, Bay was probably surprised I had even
stopped to listen.
We talked for awhile longer. I knew Bay wanted to cuddle, and normally I was
all for it. Today, though, my head was too full of what had happened with
Daphne. Why are you still thinking about it? You have your gorgeous
girlfriend in front of you!
I decided to take off just before dinner time. Bay told me she was helping
out at the fundraiser. I was very happy to know I would get to see her.
Then, it happened. I was standing by Bay's studio door getting ready to
leave, when Daphne came down from the guest house. We locked eyes and she looked
away, pain on her face. Have I lost my best friend now?
I kissed Bay quickly and headed toward my bike. Tomorrow was gonna be a long
day!
#-----------------------
The next day at the fundraiser, I was helping out with the carwash. Emmett
was busy, so I didn't bother him. Instead, I would bring around stuff that they
all needed. Towels, cleaner, whatever. Emmett and Daphne were cleaning a car
behind me when I dropped off some towels, so I quickly glanced at Emmett. He
looked upset about something. I contemplated going over to him, but decided it
would look strange, since no one really knew yet that we were dating. So, I
started walking toward another group with more towels, when Toby came up behind
me. To say that I was surprised to see him there was an understatement.
Scoffing, I said, "What are you doing here?"
Looking behind him, Toby pointed in Emmett's direction. "Don't they need
help?" he asked innocently.
Ah-ha! Now I'm on to you, Toby! "You think you wash a couple cars and Emmett
will suddenly want to play the festival?" I said, forgetting Toby knew nothing
about Emmett and I.
His eyes widened. "What, he told you?" Toby sounded surprised.
"Yeah," I confirmed. Realizing the cat was out of the bag, I told Toby, "He
and I have been, ah-" Please fill in the blank.
"Dating?" Toby was surprised again. I smiled and nodded. "You and Emmett?
Seriously?" Okay, now you're making me wonder…
"Don't look so freaked out," I said, slightly irritated.
"I'm not. I'm just, you know, taking it all in. I mean, how do you guys
communicate?" he asked me.
How else would I? I signed and spoke, "I'm learning to sign."
Toby said, "Oh, right. Right." Idiot! Looking back at Emmett again, Toby
asked, "So why doesn't he want to go with us?" Are you really that dumb?
"He doesn't usually hang out with hearing people. And, I think the fundraiser
was a one time thing for him," I said point blank.
"That sucks!" Toby whined. "Well, wait. What does that make you then?"
I thought about that for a second. What did that make me? Was I really so
different? Obviously, if Emmett wanted to be with me. Smiling, I told Toby,
"Special."
And then, Wilkie turned up too. "Hey, hey!" he said. Oh, joy…
"Oh, you're here. Didn't figure you were the charitable type," I joked. I
wasn't blind. I knew Wilkie was hot for Daphne. Even Emmett had told me about
the night he went to pick up Daphne, and her shirt was miss buttoned. Didn't
take a genius to figure that one out…
"I've been blessed with so much. I figured I should give back," Wilkie said.
Yeah, and score points with Daphne…
Toby called him out though. "I lied to him, and told him it was a bikini
carwash, so he showed up." That makes much more sense!
Wilkie actually looked affronted. "That hurts, man."
I tossed a wet rag at Wilkie's face. It landed dead on. Toby and I started
laughing.
A little while later, Toby had an idea. He bet Wilkie $20 to go through the
carwash, without a car. Wilkie being Wilkie, he took the bet. Toby and I stood
at the end to make sure he didn't chicken out. Wilkie made a huge show of
entering the wash.
Toby turned to me and said, "Think he'll make it through?"
"Nah, doubt it," I told him.
A few minutes later, Wilkie came running out, soaking wet and shivering. He
looked so ridicules, that Toby and I started laughing all over again.
"Oh, I can't believe he did that," I said, still laughing.
Wilkie came running over to us. Pushing his hair back, he told Toby, "All
right, you said $20 bucks to run through the carwash. Now quit laughing and pay
up!"
Toby was still dying. "You bailed out halfway through the hot wax, man."
"It was like a thousand degrees in there!" Wilkie protested. "I think I lost
an eyebrow."
"How's that "I'll never gamble again" thing going for both of you?" I said,
laughing.
"Awesome," Toby said, giving me a thumbs up. Wilkie was still pestering Toby
for the $20.
Just then, I saw Emmett start to walk by. I had to tell him about this. He
would love it, too. So, I grabbed his arm to stop him.
Emmett looked at me, probably thinking I was nuts. In between laughs, I tried
to explain what had happened.
"Toby," I started. "Oh! What's the sign for bet?" I couldn't honestly
remember, so I finger spelled "bet" and said, "He bet Wilkie 20 bucks that he
wouldn't go through the carwash."
Toby jumped in, telling Emmett he should have seen it. Emmett looks a little
confused. Then, Wilkie decides to jump in. This lasted for a minute, before
Emmett turned and walked away. What the hell?
He only made it a few feet, before I caught up to him. "Hey, What's wrong?" I
asked.
"You didn't know the sign for bet?" he signed back forcefully. Huh?
I was shocked for a second. "I'm sorry, okay. I forgot. I finger spelled it.
what's the big deal?" I asked, signing what I knew.
Emmett looked pissed, and kept walking. What the hell is the problem here?
"Hey," I said, grabbing his arm. "I'm studying my ass off. I'm practicing all
the time. It's a new language. It's hard to pick up in 2 weeks," I said
defensively.
He signed back, "I know!"
"Okay. Why are you picking a fight with me?" What did I miss?
Emmett signed something, but all I got was "You're going drop everything."
I signed back, "Okay. SLOW DOWN." What had he said to me?
Clearly pissed off, he signed, almost insultingly, "YOU ARE GOING TO DROP
THIS. THE WAY YOU DROP EVERYTHING!" Had he been verbally speaking, I think I
would have felt whiplash!
For the first time, I was starting to understand. I had to know if I was
right. With tears in my eyes, I asked, "Why are you doing this?"
Emmett looked down, almost like he was ashamed of his outburst. But then, he
started signing fast. I caught most, but not all, of what he was talking about.
He was tired of reading lips and was tired of working all the time. He was
himself only with other deaf people. He was mad that my family and friends were
hearing, and that would always cause problems for him. He didn't want me
interpreting for him. He ended it with, "That is not me. That will never
be me."
I felt like crying. Was he breaking up with me? And then, it hit me. I
knew where the outburst was coming from. Bracing myself, I signed flawlessly,
"Daphne told you she likes you, didn't she?"
Emmett was breathing heavy. He looked also on the verge of tears. I knew I
was right when Emmett walked away from me. I stared after him.
"What just happened?" I thought numbly to myself.
Emmett….just…walked…away…from…me! After telling me he essentially couldn't be
himself around me and that he didn't think we worked in a relationship, he
freaking walked away. I stood there a few minutes unable to move. I didn't even
notice Toby until he was standing right in front of me. I was numb from shock.
"Bay? What the hell just happened?" asked Toby.
I couldn't do anything but stare. "I think I just lost my boyfriend to
someone else," I whispered.
Toby's eyes narrowed. "Who?"
"Doesn't matter, I knew I didn't stand a chance in his world anyway." Tears
were starting to form in my eyes.
Toby pulled me into a hug. "It's alright, sis. You'll always have me."
"No, it not alright. It will never be alright ever again," I said softly.
"Want me to take you home?" Toby offered.
"Yes," I answered simply. I knew I would never make it home without breaking
down.
Toby dropped me at the house. Thankfully, no one was home. I went up to my
room and slammed the door. I screamed until my throat hurt. I screamed out all
my pain. Then I wept bitterly.
Daphne had won. I knew she would in the end. I just didn't realize how much
it would hurt letting go…..
Night came slowly. I just sat on my bed, staring at the ceiling. Thankfully,
nobody came looking for me. Thank you big brother! I was so exhausted, I
could barely keep my eyes open. I kept seeing Emmett and Daphne in my head. They
were kissing and laughing at me. I felt like a fool. Then I saw Emmett's face
after I said to him, "Daphne told you she likes you, didn't she?" I would never
forget that look.
My mind went into overdrive with thoughts….
"Daphne's been in his heart for 8 years. Why would a couple of weeks with me
make him want me more?"
"You can't sign. Daphne can…."
"I knew the risks and I lost my heart anyway…."
"They have so much more in common than we ever would…"
"I thought he wasn't like Liam or Ty, that he wouldn't break my heart. Should
have known better."
"Daphne's held his heart for 8 years. I can't compete with that."
"He doesn't have to teach Daphne sign. He's probably jumping for joy now. No
more "dummying it down" for the hearing girl."
"I give up. I can't compete. Why did I bother trying?"
I thought of Liam and Ty, two boys who never understood me.
I thought of Emmett, the boy I fell in love with. The boy who would never
know it.
Finally, the exhaustion caught up and I fell asleep, tears dripping onto my
pillow.
#---------------------
The next day at the fundraiser, Daphne avoided me like the plague. She tried
to be as far away from me as possible every chance she got. Why did that bother
me so much? I'm with Bay. I love Bay. But, I love Daphne too. She's my best
friend.
So why is the fact that she is avoiding you making you so angry?
I knew the answer to that, even though I barely wanted to admit it to myself.
That kiss had affected me more than I realized. I was up most of the night,
conflicted.
Bay or Daphne? Bay or Daphne? Bay was the one I wanted to be with, but
even I had to admit that being with Daphne would be simpler.
I was not in a great mood. My mood worsened when Daphne and I were drying the
same car a while later. I looked up and caught her eye. She turned and ran in
the opposite direction. I saw Bay walking away from me, delivering more towels
and rags to people. Surprisingly, Toby and Wilkie both showed up.
Probably still think they can get me to go to the festival with them.
I wouldn't be changing my mind, no matter HOW many cars they cleaned.
A while later, I was walking by the carwash. I see Bay and Toby laughing at
Wilkie. He is soaking wet. What the hell did that idiot do now? I really
didn't care. I tried to walk past, but Bay grabbed my arm. I looked at her
waiting. She kept laughing.
Finally she signs, "Toby," but then she seems to get stuck for a second.
Finally, she says, "What's the sign for bet?" She can't be freaking serious!
Really?
Finger spelling "bet," she continues. All those signing lessons and she
doesn't remember bet?
"He bet Wilkie 20 bucks that he wouldn't go through the carwash," she signs
and speaks, finally finishing her story.
Then Toby and Wilkie decide to jump in. I can barely focus on Bay, and you
two idiots think you are going to do any better?
Enough of this shit! I turn and walk away. I only make it a few feet, when
Bay comes up to me. "What's wrong?" she signed.
Does she not get it? I latch on to the stupidest thing. "You didn't know the
sign for bet?" I signed accusingly.
Bay was shocked for a second. "Sorry. I forgot. I finger spelled it. What's
the big deal?" she signs a few things.
For the first time, I was regretting dating a hearing girl. This was getting
to be too much. I tried to walk away again, but Bay grabbed me again.
"I'm studying - ass off. I'm practicing all - time. It's - new language. It's
hard - pick up - 2 weeks," was all I caught. She signed a few, but I was too
irritated.
I shot back, "I know!"
"Why are you picking a fight with me?" I don't know why.
Everything that had happened over the last couple of days came to the
surface. All my frustration, about Daphne, Bay's and my relationship, and the
guilt I felt about kissing Daphne flooded me.
"You're going to drop this, the way you drop everything." What the hell is
the matter with you? Stop!
Bay signed, "Okay. SLOW DOWN." That one statement sent me over the
edge. So, I exploded.
Pissed off, I signed insultingly slow, "YOU ARE GOING TO DROP THIS. THE
WAY YOU DROP EVERYTHING!"
Bay was hurt. "Why are you doing this?" she said, with tears in her eyes.
Tell her…tell her now! All of my frustration boiled up, and every pent up
feeling inside of me began to seep out in my words.
"I'm tired of reading lips and only catching 30% of what people are saying,
but pretending I'm getting more. I don't want to be working all the time. I can
only be myself with people who speak my language. And, even if you learn, your
friends are hearing, your family is hearing. And I will always be lost,
wondering what the joke is. Or worst, you'll be stuck interpreting for me.
Speaking for me. And, that is not me. That will never be me!" I am breathing
heavy now, feeling like an ass.
Bay's eyes are red. I'm so sorry Bay! Why did I say all that to you? What
the hell am I trying to prove? I hesitated, wanting to pull her into my
arms. But then.......
"Daphne told you she likes you, didn't she?" Bay signed perfectly, surprising
me. Of all the things to sign with 100% accuracy......Ah, hell…
I wanted to apologize, but would she forgive me? I had just told my
girlfriend that I didn't feel like I belonged in her world. The worst part was,
I really didn't feel that way. I don't know why I said what I did. Defeated, I
walked away. I knew words wouldn't work now. You're a coward….
I walked past Daphne on the way to my bike. Suddenly I was angry at her. I
was angry because she had just cost me the girl I love. I ignored her, and got
on my bike. Tears threatened. Revving the engine, I took off.
I went to the park. Two weeks. We dated for just two weeks. But, I knew from
the day I met her, that I wanted Bay. She was the one. And now, I've lost her
forever.
I love you, Bay Kennish. From the beginning, until the end…
Damn you, Daphne!
#---------------------------
Toby and I had some nice talks. He had been surprisingly nice to me these
last couple of days. We didn't talk about Daphne or Emmett. That subject was too
painful right now.
Instead, we talked about his music, Angelo, my art. Anything to keep my mind
off of those two…
I didn't even want to think about the two of them together. Those thoughts
hurt the most. But, they were still there.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized how much his speech made
sense. He was miserable in my world. No one supported him, except me. Even if
this hadn't happened now, it would have happened eventually. We would get tired
of trying. Maybe this was for the best….
Nights were hard. I've cried myself to sleep the last couple nights. I would
dream about them together and wake up in a cold sweat.
God, will this pain ever go away?
#----------------------
A couple days after the disaster at the carwash, I was at school. I was
having a hard time concentrating. I felt like a freaking zombie. I couldn't
sleep at night. I just kept seeing Bay's face. Why didn't I stop myself from
saying those horrible things to her? I felt so alone. In any other
situation, I would talk to Bay. But, obviously, that isn't possible now. Daphne
and my mom are a huge NO! I didn't want to hear any shit from either of them at
this point. Even my dad wouldn't be any help. Without Bay, I am truly alone in
this. I lost count of how many times I picked up my phone to text her, begging
her forgiveness. I even thought about camping outside of her house, but decided
that if John found me there, he would probably have me arrested for breaking his
daughter's heart.
God, I effed up!
I had just zipped my backpack and was heading to class, when I felt someone
tap my shoulder. I turned and saw Toby. What the hell is he doing here?
"Hey," he says.
Cut to the chase. "I'm not going to your festival."
Of course, he has no idea what I'm saying. Bay would have known….
To my surprise, though, he signs perfectly, "I don't know what you're
saying."
Not making this easy for you. "Which is why I'm not going to your festival."
Toby sighs and signs, "I'm here because of Bay." He signed "Bay," but did
this weird hair flipping motion. Just what the hell is that suppose to
be?
Scoffing, I ask, "That's your sign for Bay?"
Toby looks irritated. Get to your point, would ya! What he told me, I
couldn't believe.
"She likes you. But now, she's sad. Don't treat my sister like that," he
signed and spoke.
That took guts. He was right. I had hurt her badly. He knew it....I knew it.
She didn't deserve any of that. I was angry at Daphne, and took it out on Bay.
Did I still have a chance? Could I make this right? Was it even possible to make
it right?
The only problem I had with his signs was "sister." Moron signed "gun".
Grabbing his hand, I held up my own, making the sign for gun.
"This is gun" I mouthed to him.
"Gun? Oh, gun." he looked confused for a second. Then it hit him.
Dropping one finger, I show him. Grabbing his other hand, I showed him the
proper way to sign "sister."
He repeated it and then signed "Thanks."
It was kind of ironic. Daphne was his sister by blood, yet Bay was the sister
of his heart. He came here to champion for Bay. I owed him now.
Making a split second decision, I mouthed and signed slowly, "I'll play at
the festival with you. I owe you that much."
Toby smiled once he got what I told him. "Awesome," he signed.
I excused myself and headed toward my bike. I had to see Bay, now! I had to
get her back. She means the world to me, and I need her in my life.
Please don't let it be too late….
#-------------------------
A few days after the car wash disaster, I was walking to class at Buckner. I
just wanted to go home and bury myself under my covers, like when I was little,
and would have a nightmare. I didn't talk to anyone. I just wanted to be left
alone with my misery. Without Emmett, my life has become a monotony. I get up,
go to school, go home, go to bed. I no longer want to paint, as it reminds me of
my time with Emmett. I purposely avoid the billboard where he put up my art.
That memory really is too painful.
I also avoid Daphne. I can't face her now. She won. She knows she won. I
don't want the graphic blow by blow of her gloating conquest. I also know I will
die if I see her and Emmett doing all the things he and I did. Those thoughts
turn my stomach and make me sick.
I knew that I was completely and deeply in love with Emmett. I also knew that
now I had to bury those feelings as far down as they would go. I would never
tell him. Why suffer humiliation twice? I didn't want Daphne having more
ammunition to use. I was hurt enough already. If she knew how I felt about
Emmett….
So wrapped up in my thoughts was I, that it takes me a moment to realize
footsteps are rapidly approaching me. Good, maybe they'll run me over and
make me think of another kind of pain…
I felt a hand on my shoulder. A familiar hand. My eyes widened
slightly, and I turned, seeing the last person I ever expected to see
again…Emmett. Instantly, my heart seized, and I stopped breathing.
"Can I talk to you?" he signs. No! I'm not ready for this. I'm not ready
to say goodbye to you…
"What are you doing here?" I ask. Are you here to rub it in that you finally
got the girl you've always wanted? Are you going to gloat now?
"I shouldn't have…" he starts, but I cut him off. Can't take anymore pain.
Must retreat…
"No, it's fine. You and Daphne. I get it, I can't compete with that. Just
don't make this harder for me than it is already." Just let me walk away
before I breakdown and cry.
I turned away, intent on escape. But, Emmett grabbed my shoulder again. He
starts signing, but I have one more thing I need to say.
"Just because I always have some snappy comeback, doesn't mean that I don't
break easily." Too late anyway…I'm already broken.
I couldn't believe what he signed next…
"I've never been comfortable around hearing people. I haven't been around
them much. But, with you, it was different. From the beginning, you weren't
hearing or deaf. You were just Bay." He never saw me as different from him?
"The truth is, it would be easier if I could go find a deaf Bay. But, I
don't want a deaf Bay…."
I could only stare at him. Was he really saying what I thought he was?
And then..
"I…just…want…you." Emmett said OUT LOUD...
The tears that had been welling in my eyes dripped down. Emmett spoke
to me. I pulled him into my arms, trembling with emotion. I felt his arms
encircle me. I sent a silent "thank you" upward.
I was complete again. I had Emmett back.
After we pulled apart, Emmett leaned back in and kissed me deeply. I put all
my heart and soul into that kiss. I wouldn't vocalize how I felt, but I would
show it in my kiss.
"Forever," Emmett signed after he stopped kissing me.
"Forever," I agreed.
#---------------------
I pulled up in front of Buckner a short while later. Please let me find
Bay! I entered the back courtyard and looked around. I nearly jumped for joy
when I saw her several yards away. I raced toward her. Please, just let her hear
me out…
Running up behind her, I tap Bay's shoulder. She turns to look at me. Her
face shows surprise. But, she also looks like she has lost her zest for living.
I want to kick myself, because I know I'm the cause of her pain. I have to make
her forgive me.
"Can I talk to you?" I sign. Please, hear me out, before you send me
away…
Her face registers shock. "What are you doing here?" Trying to get back
the girl I love!
"I shouldn't have…." I start, but Bay interrupts me. I can see the tears
gathering in her eyes. I shouldn't have been such an ass. I shouldn't have
kissed Daphne. I should never have broken your heart.
"No, it's okay. It's fine. You and Daphne. I get it. I can't compete with
that. Just don't make this harder for me than it is already," she says, turning
to walk away again. No, I'm not going to lose you!
I realized something during her speech. I realized that I didn't care if Bay
could sign or not. I didn't care that I was deaf and she was hearing. I didn't
care that our relationship would always be difficult in some way or other.
What I did care about was that Bay thought I wanted Daphne. That she thought
she wasn't good enough to be with me. I cared that she was hurting as much as
me.
In that moment, I realized that I was honestly and truly, deeply in love with
Bay. I would never want another girl. Bay was it for me. She was the one I
wanted to spend my life with. She was the one I would someday marry. She was the
only one I wanted…forever.
I grabbed her shoulder again. I started to tell her all of this, but Bay
still had something to say.
"Just because I always have some snappy comeback, doesn't mean that I don't
break easily."
Truth time….bare truth. She needs to know she is the one for me. The only
one, ever.
"I've never been comfortable…." I start. Bay is looking at me confused.
Slower. This time make sure she understands everything. Try again…
"I've never been comfortable around hearing people. I haven't been around
them much." Truth is, the only hearing people I've ever been around are
Regina, and Bay and her family. "But, with you, it was different. From the
beginning, you weren't hearing or deaf. You were just Bay." You were the one,
right from the beginning. "The truth is, it would be easier if I could go
find a deaf Bay. But, I don't want a deaf Bay…."
Bay is staring at me, tears glistening in her eyes. I feel the tears welling
in my own eyes. I have to make her understand….
"I…just…want…you." I spoke out loud.
Her breath caught and the tears leaked from her eyes. I hadn't lied before. I
never spoke, not since I was 8 years old. Just for Bay, to prove I meant exactly
what I said, I spoke.
I knew I was forgiven when Bay pulled me into her arms. I felt her tremble
against me. Wrapping my arms around her, I sent a silent "thank you" upward,
toward the sky . Closing my eyes, I knew I was complete again. I had Bay back. I
was never going to lose her again.
After we pulled apart, I leaned back in and kissed Bay deeply. I put all my
heart and soul into that kiss. I wouldn't vocalize how I felt, but I would show
it in my kiss.
"Forever," I signed after I stopped kissing her.
"Forever," she agreed.
#---------------------------
Later that day, I started working on a surprise for Emmett. He told me he had
finally agreed to be the drummer for "Guitar Face." He also told me why
he had agreed to be the drummer. I would always be grateful to my brother
for what he did. I also had a new level of respect for him. But, I won't tell
Toby that!
So grateful in fact, that I even volunteered "The Thing" for them to take
their equipment down. The only rule I had was, "Wilkie doesn't drive my car!"
Toby readily agreed. I thought he would never stop hugging me.
Daphne was still avoiding me. I didn't know if Emmett had told her what had
happened or not. I certainly wouldn't. I never wanted her to know how close I
came to losing it all.
I still couldn't believe that Emmett had spoken to me. I was shocked, to put
it mildly. That he would speak, for me told me just how deep his
feelings run. I knew he would never have spoken otherwise. I felt honored
and privileged to have witnessed it.
I learned from our brief time apart. Communication was our greatest asset and
our most difficult obstacle. As long as we were honest with each other, we would
work out. Emmett and I couldn't afford to have secrets. Our relationship could
only work with honesty.
I would never lose Emmett again. I was sure of it!
#-----------------------------
Later that day, I started getting ready for the road trip I would be on with
Toby and Wilkie. I owed Toby more than he knew. The least I could do was be his
drummer. I told Bay that I had finally agreed to go with them. She beamed, so I
knew I had made the right choice. I also told her about why I had agreed.
Bay was shocked that her brother had come to me and basically kicked me into
action. I had a new level of respect for Toby now. But, I won't ever tell him!
I couldn't believe it when Bay volunteered her car for our drive down. Her
rule about Wilkie not driving was freaking hysterical. I couldn't blame her on
that front. I wouldn't even trust him with my bike.
I didn't tell Daphne about anything that had happened. Ever since the kiss,
she seemed standoffish. Was our friendship ruined now? Because I had chosen Bay,
did I lose my best friend?
Don't get me wrong. I would chose Bay over and over again. I just felt
terrible about what happened with Daphne. I knew that kiss would hang over our
heads. I just hoped, down the road, my decision not to tell Bay doesn't come
back to bite me in the ass….
I knew Bay had been shocked when I spoke to her. I hope she understands just
how deep my feelings run. I actually started looking into Speech Therapy
classes. I wanted to communicate with my girlfriend.
I learned from our brief time apart. Communication was our greatest asset and
our most difficult obstacle. Honesty was key to our long term happiness. We
couldn't afford to have secrets. Well, I had 1 secret, but I knew telling Bay
would only hurt her more. So, I would lie by omission.
I would never lose Bay again. I was sure of it!
#-----------------------------
A couple days later, Daphne and I were standing in the driveway, watching
Toby and Wilkie load the U-Haul attached to the back of my car. Emmett hadn't
arrived yet. He was probably having a hard time getting away from his mother…
"Bay, thanks for letting us use your car," Toby said, loading up the drum set
on the U-Haul. Geez, how much shit do you need?
"Yeah, sure. I thought you were playing, like, 4 songs?" I asked
suspiciously.
"Hey, go big or go home," Toby cracked. Even Daphne got a chuckle out of that
one.
"You sure you don't want to be our roadie? Last chance," Wilkie said,
flirting with Daphne. She looked at Toby, confused.
"R-o-a-d-i-e," Toby finger spelled. "You know, beer fueled guys who are
muscular. You know, who move stuff and check out groupies," he signed rather
comically.
"Oh! Tempting, but no," she told Wilkie. Right answer, Daphne!
By this time, Emmett was pulling in the driveway. He parked his bike behind
me, and removed his helmet. That boy has some sexy helmet hair!
Wilkie said, "There he is!" and then tried to sign, "We are going to rock!"
Emmett just nodded and held up his hand in the "rock out" sign. Toby also did
the same.
As Emmett came around the front of his bike, I grabbed his surprise and
walked toward him. He smiled at my approach. Daphne, however, walked toward
Toby. Whatever…
Signing, I told Emmett, "Hey. So, I, um have something for you."
His face lit up. "For me?" Emmett queried.
I handed him the box. He smiled again before pulling it open. Reaching
inside, he pulled out a drum front that had "Guitar Face" painted on it. Emmett
looked shocked and excited at the same time.
"It's for the front of your drum kit," I signed unnecessarily. I wanted to
show off my skills a little.
"I know," Emmett signed. Then, in front of Daphne and the boys, Emmett leaned
in and kissed me. I couldn't help the smile that came to my face. He was showing
them that we are officially a couple. Not that we hadn't been already. But now,
we no longer had to hide it. I wanted to screech with glee.
After Emmett pulled away, Toby asked to see the drum front. We agreed and I
handed it to Toby. I also pulled out stickers that I had made as well and gave
them to both Toby and Wilkie. They loved the stickers.
"Well, alright gentlemen. The roads a-callin," Wilkie chirped. Toby seconded
that notion. "Let's go!"
I took the drum front back from Toby and placed it back in the box. After all
the work I put into it, I wasn't letting them ruin it. I saw Emmett and Daphne
signing to each other. I didn't pay attention to what they were saying though.
In a way, I was still a little jealous of their relationship, but at the same
time, I had a better one. And, it would just keep getting better. I saw them
hug, before Emmett came over and patted my back. Emmett climbed in the back
seat. Wonder if we'll ever use that back seat?
Wilkie turned around, and he and Emmett did the fist bump. I couldn't not
laugh at that. We waved them off. Daphne shouted, "Yeah, Rock on!" Just as they
hit the road, I heard Wilkie yell, "Road Trip!" I hope Emmett can survive 3 days
with them….
After the boys were out of our sight, I signed, "And the world will never be
the same." Daphne scoffed, and started to walk away. I know I shouldn't, but I
have to ask….
I grabbed her arm and said, "Hey. Uh, I'm just checking. Is everything okay?"
I needed to know.
"Fine," she answered cryptically. Okay, little more info would be
nice.
"Cool, cause I know it's been like, one harsh thing after another lately," I
said, trying to be optimistic.
"In a way, it's been helpful. I know what I want," Daphne said. Alrighty
then…
"Okay. Hey, that's good," I told her. Something was bugging me though.
Something I hoped I was wrong about. "What is that, exactly?" Please let me be
wrong!
"I'm not giving up this time. You didn't want me to be with Liam, so I broke
up with him," she stated. God, is she still stuck on that? Then she said
what I was dreading. "But, I'm not giving up on Emmett."
Considering that battle lines are now being drawn, I'd say I'm being pretty
calm about this whole thing. And, just why has Daphne decided to stop signing to
me now? She always had before? Did she think that by stopping, I would give up?
Not on your life!
"I was checking in about Angelo," I told her. I was taken aback by her open
hostility. This is not going to end well.
"I'm not okay with that either." Wow, who is this bitch and where did the
real Daphne go?
"Oh, okay. But, he's my dad, so…"
Daphne shrugged and walked away.
I'm so screwed!
#------------------------------
It took me forever to get out of the house. Mom kept asking me question after
question. I finally told her that they would leave without me if I didn't get
there soon, and then she would have to drive me to St. Louis.
2 minutes later, I was out the door.
As I pulled into the Kennish driveway several minutes later, I saw Toby
mimicking something to Daphne. Okay then. We really have to work on his
signing….
Wilkie saw me and started talking, but all I caught was the ending when he
signed, "We rock." I did the Rock out sign and got off my bike. As I came around
the front, Bay approached me with a flat box. I smiled at her and waited. Daphne
stepped away. Was she still upset? Oh, well….I focused on Bay.
Signing, she told me, "So, I, um have something for you."
Oh, a present! "For me?" I asked excitedly.
Bay handed me the box. I smiled again before pulling it open. Reaching
inside, I pulled out a drum front that had "Guitar Face" painted on it. Oh my
god! This is freaking awesome.
"It's for the front of your drum kit," Bay signed. Already knew that, but I
loved seeing her sign anyway!
"I know," I replied. In front of Daphne and the boys, I leaned in and kissed
my girlfriend. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught a small sour look from
Daphne. Sorry, but I wasn't going to hide my feelings anymore. I wanted everyone
to know that Bay Kennish is my girlfriend. I was proving that we are a couple.
After I pulled away, Toby wanted to see the drum front. We agreed and Bay
handed it to Toby. She pulled some stickers out of her pocket and handed them
off to Wilkie. I couldn't tell if she said anything to Toby though, as her back
was to me. Finally, Wilkie started talking again. I couldn't tell what he said,
but he and Toby headed for the car. Okay, guess we're leaving now.
Daphne tapped my arm. "Be safe. And don't let these clowns do anything
stupid," Daphne advised.
I looked at Toby and Wilkie. They were giving each other high fives. Them?
Stupid? Nah!
Daphne and I hugged. I was glad to see that she finally seemed to be over the
whole thing from the carwash. I would hate it if that ruined our friendship. I
tapped Bay on the back, before getting in the backseat.
Wilkie turned and fist bumped me. This was going to be a long 3 days!
As we were pulling out, I saw Daphne do the sign for "Rock On!" and had to
laugh. I looked at Bay, committing her face to my memory. That would have to
tide me over until we got back home.
Things are definitely looking up!
#--------
Disclaimer: Switched At Birth is owned by Lizzy Weiss and ABC Family. No
copyright infringement is meant. I am using the characters for entertainment
purposes only.
Disclaimer: There will be "M" rated themes in later chapters......
#-----------
Chapter 8- episode 10
The morning after my birthday, I woke up with a splitting headache. The
reason for the headache, was a certain strawberry blonde deaf girl who was
sleeping down the hall. I had spent much of the night crying my eyes out.
Daphne likes Emmett, Daphne likes Emmett, Daphne likes Emmett…
I knew I had two choices…
1. Let Emmett know before Daphne had a chance to….
Or
2. Let Daphne tell Emmett herself…
Either way, I knew the end result….
I would lose Emmett.
Once he knew that Daphne liked him, he would kick me to the curb. This has
been his dream, Daphne feeling the same way he does. Did? I don't honestly know
anymore.
What I do know is that I have deep feelings for Emmett, deeper than I had
ever felt with Liam or Ty….
That's because you're in love with Emmett.
I know, it's weird to be in love with someone you've only known for a few
weeks. But, from the beginning, there was a connection, a feeling that I
can't explain. It was like our souls connected and came together. I felt like he
was my other half, my reason for existing.
My soul mate….
What was I going to do?
Maybe I should just breakup with Emmett, and save myself the heartache and
humiliation later….
A little while later, I got a text from Emmett, telling me he was outside, waiting. He never came up the driveway anymore if Daphne was home. Only if he was coming to see her specifically, would he pull into the driveway.
Should I tell him what Daphne told me? I texted back, "BRO"
(translation-Be right out). "Here goes nothing," I muttered to myself.
Walking down the driveway, I spied Emmett sitting on his bike. I never got
tired of seeing him astride it. The bike gave him a "bad boy" look.
How much longer would he be mine? Was he still mine? That
thought made me pause, causing a wave of sadness to envelope me. Maybe Daphne
had already spoken to him. Maybe that was why he was here. To breakup with me?
Emmett got off his bike, waiting for me. I stopped just out of his reach.
Might as well get it over with….
"Hi, Emmett. Daphne is in the main house," I told him flatly. Surprise
flashed on his face.
"I'm here to see you, not her. Why do I care where she is right now?" he
signed and mouthed. Okay, that's a good sign, I hope…
I signed, "Garage…" hoping he would understand I wanted us to go to my
garage. I turned around, heading in that direction. Emmett followed me. Could he
tell something was off?
After we got in the garage, Emmett pulled me into a kiss. I stiffened for a
second, thinking about him doing this with Daphne, before I kissed him back…
the thought made me ill….
"What's wrong?" Emmett signed. Damn it, he noticed me stiffen up. Play it
off…
"Nothing," I responded. "What's going on with you?" He looked confused now.
Emmett waved his hands at me. This was ridicules. I need to ask him…
"Did something happen, Bay? Why are you acting so strange?" Emmett signed and
mouthed.
Again, sadness overwhelmed me. Here goes nothing…
I sat down on my couch. Emmett sat next to me. Taking a deep breathe, I asked
him the question I never wanted to ask…
"Why are you with me?" I saw confusion again.
"Why shouldn't I be with you?" he signed back.
I should just tell him. He'll pick her. I know he will. I need to save my
heart, before it gets stomped on. Lead him toward it…
"I just mean…." I stopped, agonizing over my next words, "would you be
happier with a deaf girl?"
"I'm happy with you," he mouthed and signed. Why are you making this so
hard?
"I know that. I just think it must be hard for you, always having to read
lips. If I could sign as well as Daphne, it would be better," I mouthed slowly.
Smooth, Bay. Real smooth.
Emmett took one of my hands in his. The other he placed along side my cheek.
"You will," he mouthed simply.
"I just feel like I'm making things more difficult for you," Bay said slowly.
Would he think I'm trying to break up with him? Do I want him to think
that?
"Bay, where is this coming from?" Emmett asked. I saw determination on his
face. I can't do this now…
"Never mind. I just realized how stupid this whole thing is. Forget I said
anything," I told him, backpedaling. Thankfully, he changed the subject.
"Daphne and I are doing a fundraiser for Carlton. We are raising money for
school activities. I was hoping your dad would be willing to let us use one of
his carwashes," he signed and mouthed.
I nodded. Dad would definitely want to help out. "I'm sure he'll say yes. He
loves to help the community. I'll ask him today."
"We want to have it next week. Probably Friday or Saturday. Is that too
soon?" Emmett asked.
"It should be okay. Dad has plenty of them to spare," I told him. Then I
remembered... "There's a student art show at Buckner I entered this weekend. I
forgot to tell you. Do you think you might be able to come?"
"I can try. Daphne and I were going to go over the stuff for the fundraiser
this weekend," Emmett replied.
We talked about the pieces I was going to enter and I showed them to him.
Emmett stayed for a few hours before he had to head back home.
This time, when Emmett kissed me goodbye, I kissed him back with no
hesitation. For now, he's still mine. He got on his bike and waved before
driving away.
Thankfully he hadn't asked me if I spoke to Daphne. I prayed he never did….
#------------------------------
I woke up the morning after Bay's birthday with a smile. I was sure by now,
that Bay had told Daphne about us. No more sneaking around. No more hiding.
The thought of it made me giddy.
Checking my phone, I was surprised that Bay still hadn't texted me. Maybe she
was still sleeping. That's okay, I'll be seeing Bay later anyway.
I wanted to talk to her about the fundraiser Daphne and I were working on at
Carlton. I was hoping her dad would be willing to "loan" us one of his car
washes.
Later that day, I pulled up to the Kennish driveway. I sent Bay a text,
letting her know I was waiting. A few seconds later, I got a reply.
"BRO" (translation- Be right out)
A moment or so later, my beautiful girlfriend came into view. I thanked God
everyday that I had someone as perfect as Bay in my life. She was the other half
of me. She completed me. Why did I feel like that?
Because you're in love with Bay….
I know, it's weird being in love with someone that I've only known for a few
weeks. But, I knew, right from the beginning. She was my reason for existing. I
was put on this Earth to be with her…
She's my soul mate…
As Bay approached me, I thought I saw a trace of sadness on her face. But, it
passed so quickly, I could have imagined it. I hopped off my bike so I could
grab her when she got close enough. However, Bay stopped just out of my reach.
"Hi, Emmett. Daphne is in the main house," she told me by way of a greeting.
What the? I'm not here for Daphne…
"I'm here to see you, not her. Why do I care where she is right now?" Okay,
strange way to start a conversation. What the hell was going on?
Bay signed, "Garage…" meaning she wanted us to go to her garage. Okay, sounds
good to me. She turned around, heading in that direction.
I followed after her. Bay's acting weird. Is Bay hiding something? One way to
find out….
After we got in her garage, I pulled her into a kiss. She stiffened for a
second, before she kissed me back…
"What's wrong?" I signed. Something was definitely up. Bay never
stiffened up like that when I kissed her.
"Nothing," she responded. "What's going on with you?" Huh?
I waved my hands at her. This was ridicules. She was acting really strange,
even for her.
"Did something happen, Bay? Why are you acting so strange?" I signed and
mouthed.
Again, there's that sadness on her face again. I know I didn't imagine it
this time.
Bay sat on her couch. I sat next to her. She faced me and said the last thing
I ever expected her to say…
"Why are you with me?" What the hell?
"Why shouldn't I be with you?" I signed back. What was she getting at?
Bay looked thoughtful for a moment. What was going through that head of hers?
"I just mean…." Bay, stopped. "would you be happier with a deaf girl?"
She's joking, right?
"I'm happy with you," I mouthed and signed.
"I know that. I just think it must be hard for you, always having to read
lips. If I could sign as well as Daphne, it would be better," she mouthed
slowly. Aahhh, now I see….
I took one of her hands in mine. The other I placed along side her cheek.
"You will," I mouthed simply.
"I just feel like I'm making things more difficult for you," Bay said slowly.
Is she trying to break up with me?
"Bay, where is this coming from?" I asked. I was getting to the bottom of
this.
"Never mind. I just realized how stupid this whole thing is. Forget I said
anything," Bay backpedaled.
This isn't over. Not by a long shot….
Dropping the subject, I decided to tell her my reason for being here…
"Daphne and I are doing a fundraiser for Carlton. We are raising money for
school activities. I was hoping your dad would be willing to let us use one of
his carwashes," I signed and mouthed.
Bay nodded. "I'm sure he'll say yes. He loves to help the community. I'll ask
him today."
"We want to have it next week. Probably Friday or Saturday. Is that too
soon?" I asked her.
"It should be okay. Dad has plenty of them to spare," she told me. Then she
told me, "There's a student art show at Buckner I entered this weekend. I forgot
to tell you. Do you think you might be able to come?"
"I can try. Daphne and I were going to go over the stuff for the fundraiser
this weekend," I replied.
We talked about what she was going to enter and she showed me the pieces. I
stayed for a few hours before I had to head back home.
This time, when I kissed Bay goodbye, she kissed me back with no hesitation.
I got on my bike and waved before I drove away.
Halfway home, I realized I never did get to the bottom of Bay's strange
behavior. Maybe Mom said something to her after the party last night. Mom was
still there when I dropped Bay back off. Had she gotten to Bay somehow? Made her
doubt our relationship in some way? Maybe I should go back and ask Bay. Would
she tell me?
I also realized I forgot to ask her if she had talked to Daphne. Of course
Bay had. She had no reason not to…..
In the end, I decided to just go home. I needed to start planning the
fundraiser. I would talk to Bay after the fundraiser was over about her
behavior.
#-----------------------
I talked to my father, and just as I suspected, he was more than happy to
loan out a carwash for the fundraiser. I sent Emmett a text, telling him Dad's
answer. His response was "Great, I'll let Daphne know when she comes over."
I wasn't worried about the art show. I knew I had great pieces to display.
What I was worried about was Daphne. When was she going to tell Emmett?
How much time did I have? There was never a question of knowing he would pick
me. I knew better. Daphne was the one he really wanted. I knew my time
with him was limited.
Make it count, Bay. No matter how long you have left with Emmett. Don't go
down without a fight….
The week passed by uneventfully. Emmett was planning their fundraiser, so I
didn't see him very much. I missed him. I wanted as much time as I could get
with him. But, I couldn't hover either.
The morning of the art show, I woke up in a great mood. I had my pieces ready
to go and I couldn't wait to show off my art. The show was suppose to be 4
hours. Apparently, they had a lot of entries.
2 hours in, I noticed a man looking at my art. He was tall and exotic
looking. Not bad to look at either. He seemed very interested in my work, so I
did what any artist would do…I sidled over to talk him up.
"You like?" I asked exotic man.
"It's incredible," he said with a European accent. Okay, even his voice is
hot. "I love the sense of the movement. Reminds me of cave paintings." Is
he an artist too? "Surrealist."
How cool is this man? He figured out my paintings on the first try.
Squueeeellll! "Yeah, that's exactly what I was going for. Surrealism."
The man turned to look at me closer. Flustered, I said, "It's spray paint and
stencil, in case you're interested."
He looked at me with new interest. "Are you Bay? The artist?"
"Yeah," I said. obviously…. "Let me guess. You're a curator from a
gallery in New York? Or Paris?" How awesome would that be?
Smiling, he said, "No, I'm not." Damn!
" A scout looking for the next "Basquiat?" Help me out here… "Because,
I'm also into neo-expressionism, part Puerto Rican, and extremely gifted.
But, anti-heroin. Heroin's bad," I told him straight faced.
"No, I'm not from any gallery. I'm sorry," he told me.
"Bummer!" I really wished he had been. On the plus side though, "Hey! You
like art, though. So, that's cool." Then I noticed him staring at my wrist.
"Wow," he said. What was he looking at?
"Yeah?" I asked him.
"I'm wondering where you got my lucky guitar pick?" Back up, mister!
"Your guitar pick?" Then I really looked at the pick, remembering.
Emmett and I found the guitar pick in Angelo's car…. My eyes widened.
Could it be? "Angelo?" We stared at each other.
"Nice to meet you, sweetheart," Angelo said softly. The truth slammed into
me.
My biological father was standing right here in front of me…and he was happy
to meet me!
Then the apprehension started….
"How did you find me? When did you find out? What are you doing here?"
I asked, starting to panic. Did Regina know he's here? Did she send him?
"I know this is sudden, but I just found out, and I really wanted to see you.
Look at you.." Angelo said, reaching toward me. I backed away, still feeling him
out. No touching!
Angelo could probably sense my hesitance, because he then asked, "Um, how is
Regina and Daphne?" So, Regina hadn't sent him. That made me feel a little
better.
"Their good." What else could I say?
"Are they here? I'd love to see them," Angelo said, looking around. Right,
because they would so want to come to see my art.
"Uh no, their not. I don't think that's such a great idea," I said in a rush.
"You seeing them. I mean, they don't have the fondest memories of you."
"I'm sure you've heard a lot of things about me," he started. Not
really…. "But I hope you can make up your own mind."
"Why did you just show up here? I mean, why didn't you call? This is so not
fair!" God, I sound like a whiny teenager!
I wish Emmett was here…..
Angelo was about to answer me, when Dad walked up to us. Any other time, this
would have bothered me, but not today.
"Hey, sweetie. Everything okay?" he asked, sizing up Angelo. Oh! Can't
tell Dad the truth…
"Yeah," I said. My two dad's continued to stare at each other. "This is a
gallery owner, from downtown," I lied.
"Oh," Dad said, looking a little bit relieved.
"This is- this is my dad, John Kennish," I introduced him to Angelo. Dad
stuck out his hand and Angelo shook it.
"Hi! Gallery owner? That's great!"
"Angelo. Nice to meet you," Angelo returned.
"Nice to meet you. Are you a parent here?" Dad asked. Please say no,
please say no…
"Yes, I am," Angelo stumbled a little. Damn!
"A lot of interesting work, huh? Bay certainly is talented," Dad boosted. I
laughed nervously. "She's working on a piece right now. It's wild. It's like,
uh, tape and spray-"
"Spray paint," I supplied nervously.
"Paint. Spray paint. Yeah, I don't know where she comes up with this stuff?"
Dad finished.
Fortunately, I heard Mom say "Honey?" trying to get Dad's attention. He
looked at her, and she mimed golfing.
"My wife is trying to wrangle me into the celebrity golf tournament, so I
better go do that," Dad told Angelo. Good, this is getting weird! "It's
nice to meet you," he said, holding out his hand again.
"Very nice to meet you, too," Angelo said, returning the handshake.
"I'll see you," Dad told me before going over to join Mom.
"Bye," I said softly. Sighing, I told Angelo, "That was surreal."
He actually smiled. "Look, I'm staying at the Bowman Hotel for the next 3
days. I'd love to see you. But, if you don't want to, I understand." I want
to, but…. "I'm just very happy I got a chance to meet my daughter."
I stood there, frozen. This is what I've wanted. I wanted to find Angelo, and
now….
"Bye," he said quietly, before walking away.
I have to tell Emmett about this. Hell, I have to Daphne about this
too!
My life just got a lot more complicated…
#-----------------------
The morning of Bay's art show, Daphne came over. Would she say anything about
Bay and I? I was planning on going over the fundraiser stuff with Daphne, and
then if I had time, I was going to head over to the art show and support Bay.
Daphne came in carrying a folder. Apparently, she had a few ideas as well.
Daphne was signing very animatedly the whole way up to my bedroom. I was quite
happy. Daphne must have taken the news of Bay and I quite well, for her to be
this happy. Finally, something goes our way….
As I opened my bedroom door, Daphne was talking about the fundraiser.
"I want this to be the biggest fundraiser Carlton's ever had. I want to break
records!" she said gleefully.
"It's not a competition," I told her. We don't need to toss every one else in
the dirt. On second thought, "Oh, wait. You're a Kennish. Everything is a
competition," I said with a smile. Daphne just laughed. Then she reached for the
folder she had just tossed on my bed.
"We could do graphic T-shirts, or a 5K run…" she said, showing me the
drawings she had created. Daphne was talented, but not nearly as much as my Bay.
I did like her ideas, but….
"These are cool…but I already spoke with John. He said we could do a car wash
next weekend and all proceeds go to the school," I told her happily. I thought
Daphne would be pleased. I wasn't expecting her to get upset.
"You spoke to John?" she asked, her face questioning. "When?"
Now I was confused. "Actually, I spoke to Bay. She worked it out."
Daphne looked annoyed. "You and I are organizing this fundraiser. Why would
you talk to Bay?" Suddenly, something over my shoulder caught Daphne's eye. She
looked confused before she walked toward my wall. My Bay wall…
She stared at my wall for a moment. Finally she turned and faced me. Why does
she not look happy right now? Didn't Bay…
"What's going on?" Daphne asked, confusion clearly written on her face.
Bay hadn't told her yet?
Wanting to confirm my suspicion, I asked Daphne, "Bay didn't talk to you?"
From the look on her face, I'm guessing NO! Which begs the question, why?
"You said nothing was going on." Daphne was hurt, I could see it.
"It wasn't then," I told her honestly. At least till the next
day…
Then Daphne got angry. "You said if Brooklyn Decker came down from the
mountain of supermodels, you wouldn't date her." I only told you that to get you
off my back! "You said you'd wait for a deaf girl."
Now, I was wishing I hadn't told her that to start with. Yes, I had wanted a
deaf girl before. I had wanted Daphne for years. But, she didn't see me that
way, so I finally moved on.
"I did wait. I didn't want to wait anymore." Bay came into my life. I wasn't
passing up that chance.
"Why are you doing this?" Daphne questioned. Why am I doing this? What the
hell?
"What do you mean?" I asked. Daphne just stared at me. "I LIKE HER!" Got a
problem with that?
Daphne got a disbelieving look. Then she ranted. "I've known you my entire
life. You've never been interested in a hearing girl?" Not before. "And
now Bay? Of all people?"
Seriously! What, does Bay have the plague or something? Why shouldn't I be
with her? I was suddenly reminded of my conversation earlier in the week with
Bay. Had she tried to tell Daphne, and got this response? Now I was mad.
"Yes. Bay of all people," I told her, irritated.
Daphne shook her head before telling me, "No." You think you're dictating
my relationship for me? I don't think so….
Wanting to put an end to this, I told her, "I'm not asking your permission."
End of Discussion!
Daphne was angry. I didn't care. Bay was my choice. Being my best friend only
gave her so much leeway. And she was seriously pushing the boundary line of our
friendship.
Daphne and I stared each other down. Finally, she shook her head, grabbed her
bag and ran out the door.
Well, that just went SOOOOOOOOO well…..
#-----------------------------
I decided that Daphne needed to know before anyone else that Angelo was here,
in town. At the moment, I didn't care about her feelings for Emmett, I just
needed her to hear it before Angelo dropped in on her and Regina unexpectedly. I
figured I could be that nice. Just this once.
After school, I raced home as quick as I could. Emmett hadn't shown up at the
showing. I wasn't worried. They probably just got caught up in planning the
fundraiser. Pulling up to the house, I saw Daphne sitting outside, doing
homework. Perfect! I jumped out of my car, racing toward her.
Daphne looked up at my approach. "Hey. I was just coming to talk to you," I
started. Why does she look angry?
"How come you didn't tell me you were dating Emmett?" Daphne replied, ice in
her voice. Oh, shit…
I'm sure my face mirrored my surprise. I realized Emmett must have said
something to her this morning, not knowing I hadn't told her yet. Think
fast…
Apologetically, I said, "I'm sorry. There wasn't exactly a good time to tell
you. But, I should have." When was I suppose to tell you? When you declared
your feelings for my boyfriend?
"You don't even know him," Daphne countered. She was glaring daggers now.
"That's why we're dating. We're getting to know each other," I told her. How
else do you get to know someone?
"You will never know him," she told me rudely. Okay, now I'm pissed.
Is this what she did to Emmett?
I quipped about vampires and humans dating. If they could, Emmett and I
certainly could. Daphne wasn't amused.
Daphne stood up and stalked toward me. Getting in my face, she said harshly,
"He's my best friend. You can't find some one else? Really?" If he was
really your best friend, you would honor his choices, not bash them down!
I fought back. "You decided you liked him off a T-shirt. And the only reason
that you realized it, is because your life is falling apart, and you're looking
for someone to cling to." Take that, bi-atch!
"I should have never told you anything," Daphne stated.
I was too pissed off to care, though. And, I wasn't finished with her yet,
either.
"And what happens when things go back to normal? Is he just gonna turn into
your little lap dog again? Is that really what you want for him?" I said
angrily. Let her see just how pissed I am right now!
"Is that what you came to tell me?" she asked, just as angry. Screw you,
if you think I'll tell you anything now! You can rot in HELL!
"Yeah, that was it," I told her. I pushed around her and headed for my room.
On the way, I sent a text to Emmett.
"Need to talk to you. Are you busy?"
A moment later, I got a response. "Nope. I'm all yours!"
#--------------------------------
After Daphne stormed away, I contemplated texting Bay to find out why she
hadn't said anything to Daphne. Looking at the clock, I realized she was still
at the art showing. Should I go? I finally decided to just stay home. I
had already seen Bay's pieces, anyway. I would make it up to her later.
I was still angry at Daphne. How dare she try to tell me I couldn't date Bay!
What gave her the right to try and dictate my choices? Just because she bailed
out of her relationship with "The Loser" doesn't mean I plan on doing the same
with Bay! What the hell was her freaking problem?
I was ready to hop on my bike and go take pictures to blow off steam, when my
phone vibrated. Checking the caller ID, I smiled when I saw Bay's name. Eagerly,
I opened the message.
"Need to talk to you. Are you busy?"
Never too busy to spend time with my girlfriend. Quickly, I typed in, "Nope.
I'm all yours!" and hit send.
After the Daphne fiasco, I really needed to see my beautiful girlfriend.
Hopefully, also, I would find out why she hadn't told Daphne about us….
#-----------------------------
I picked Emmett up at his house. Emmett said he was hungry, so we stopped at
a fast food joint and I ordered his food from the drive-thru. All the way to the
water park, I was trying to figure out how to ask Emmett about his conversation
with Daphne. I was also dying to tell him about Angelo's surprise visit.
Once we got to the water park, I pulled to a stop by the fountain. Emmett
decided to sit on the hood and eat his lunch. I wandered back and forth, trying
to work up my courage.
Emmett, however, beat me to the punch. Waving his hand, he gestured for me to
come closer. Here it comes…
"Why didn't you tell Daphne about us?" he signed. I sighed. Gee, I don't
know. Maybe because she suddenly decided to declare her love for you, just as I
was going to tell her! Nope, can't tell him that.
"I couldn't think of a good way to tell her," I lied through my teeth. Emmett
stared at me. Could he tell I was lying? Shit, I forgot how good he is at
reading body language.
Then he surprised me. "She was pretty upset when she saw the pictures on my
wall of you." Pictures of me? What about his Daphne wall?
"She didn't take it well, then?" I asked him.
Emmett looked thoughtful. Finally, he shook his head.
"How bad was it?" I dared question. The silence I received told me everything
I needed to know. She had been furious! And why wouldn't she have been?
"Doesn't matter. It's out in the open now. No more hiding," Emmett mouthed
and signed happily. "So, what did you want to tell me about?"
Taking a deep breath, I signed and said, "Angelo's here."
Emmett's eyebrows raised into his forehead. "Here? In KC?" he signed.
"Yeah. He showed up at the art show. The only reason I knew it was him, was
because he commented on the guitar pick," I told him as slowly as I could,
signing quite a bit.
"Did he say what he wanted? Why is he just coming around now? Is he staying?"
Emmett mouthed and signed quickly. Holy…one question at a time!
"Not really. I don't know. Again, I don't know. He was happy he got to meet
me," I told him slowly.
"Okay, tell me everything. From the beginning," Emmett signed.
Taking another deep breath, I repeated everything that had happened. From
seeing Angelo looking at my paintings to the moment he walked away. It took a
little while. Emmett just sat patiently, not interrupting. Then I got irritated.
I mean, who does Angelo really think he is? So, I ranted. And, I paced, signing
for Emmett's benefit.
"He just waltzes in, without warning, tells me he's here for 72 hours, and
then just expects me to drop everything and get to know him. Risk pissing off
Daphne and my parents, ha ha, all 3 of them!" Emmett is watching me, calmly
eating his meatball sandwich. Must be nice….
Finally, I faced Emmett directly. Deflating a bit, I tell him, "I want to be
mad. But, I'm not. I mean, he's never done anything to me. How do I know what's
true, unless, I hear what he has to say?" I had signed almost all of it
and was very proud of myself. I realized I was fed up with the whole situation.
I was surprised that Angelo was here, to say the least. Maybe, for once, he
would be on my side instead of Daphne.
I was tired of sneaking around. I was proud to be with Emmett, and I wanted
the world to know it. I was tired of everyone being on Daphne's side. Even
Emmett still had to choose sides between his girlfriend and best friend!
Emmett, his mouth full, signs back, "You don't." Show off!
"How do you sign and eat at the same time?" I ask him, curious.
Emmett chuckles. "Lots of practice," he signs. Really?
Playfully, I grabbed his sandwich away. Watching him eat was starting to make
me hungry. I took a bite to see how he'd react. He just smiled and took a drink
of his soda. Does nothing bother him?
I'm sorry Daphne got mad at you," I told him. She should take it out on me,
not Emmett.
Emmett shrugged it off. "I don't care. She has no right to judge me," he
signed and mouthed.
"Okay," I started, handing him his sandwich back. "Things have been kind of
sucky for her lately, and it can't be easy for her, that we're together. And, I
just- I feel kinda bad." Why the hell was I defending her? She's trying to
steal my boyfriend!
Apparently, Emmett was done talking about Daphne. He signed something about,
"What are you going to do about…" but I didn't catch the ending. I looked at him
with confusion. Then he signed, "Father." Okay?
"Father….A…N…" Oh, duh! "Angelo? Angelo? Oh, what am I going to do about
Angelo?"
He nodded and waited. What was I going to do?
"I don't know. Maybe I'm better off just letting this one go," I told him and
signed. He shook his head.
"We both know that's not going to happen," he signed. He knows me too
well…
"Emmett, you think I go looking for trouble?" I asked. Did I really want his
answer?
"He is your father. You have to go," he signed. I hate when he's right!
I decided Emmett was right. I owed it to myself to at least see what Angelo
has to say. I figured now was as good a time as any. I dropped Emmett at the
carwash so he and Daphne could start getting things together for the fundraiser.
Just before he got out of the car, Emmett signed, "If you need me, text me.
If anything happens, I'll be there as fast as I can."
"I will," I promised him. As Emmett walked away, I thought, "Here we go.."
#----------------------
Bay picked me up at my house. I hadn't had lunch, so I told Bay I was hungry.
We stopped at a fast food joint and she ordered at the drive-thru. All the way
to the water park, I was trying to figure out how to ask Bay why she hadn't
spoken to Daphne.
At the water park, Bay pulled up by the fountain. I sat on the hood to eat my
lunch. I wasn't getting Bay's nice new car dirty with meatball sauce. Bay paced
in front of me. Something was on her mind, that was obvious. I waved my hand to
gain her attention. When she looked, I gestured for her to come closer.
"Why didn't you tell Daphne about us?" I signed. I saw Bay sigh. I really
wasn't mad, merely curious. There had to be a reason…
"I couldn't think of a good way to tell her," She told me. I stared at her.
Her body language told me she was on edge, but there was something else there
too. Fear? Why would Bay be afraid to tell me something?
I signed, "She was pretty upset when she saw the pictures on my wall of you."
Bay's eyes widened. Shit, I never got to show her the new pictures on my wall.
She hasn't been back in my room..
"She didn't take it well, then?" Bay asked me. You could say that…..
Deciding silence was the best answer, I shook my head.
"How bad was it?" Bay questioned. I stared at her, telling her with my eyes
she really didn't want to know. Unconsciously, Bay nodded her head at my
silence.
"Doesn't matter. It's out in the open now. No more hiding," I mouthed and
signed happily. "So, what did you want to tell me about?" Because, obviously
that wasn't it..
Bay took a deep breath before signing and saying, "Angelo's here."
Angelo? Her father! What the hell! "Here? In KC?" I questioned.
"Yeah. He showed up at the art show. The only reason I knew it was him, was
because he commented on the guitar pick," She told me slowly, signing quite a
bit.
Questions immediately flooded my mind. Signing quickly, I fired them off.
"Did he say what he wanted? Why is he just coming around now? Is he staying?"
"Not really. I don't know. Again, I don't know. He was happy he got to meet
me," She told me slowly. I was impressed she had caught everything I had signed.
"Okay, tell me everything. From the beginning," I signed. I need to know
if he is a threat to Bay..
Taking another deep breath, Bay told me everything from the beginning. From
seeing Angelo looking at her paintings to the moment he walked away. It took her
a little while. I sat patiently, not interrupting. Then, she started to pace,
signing for my benefit. I could see the irritation coming off her.
"He just waltzes in, without warning, tells me he's here for 72 hours, and
then just expects me to drop everything and get to know him. Risk pissing off
Daphne and my parents, ha ha, all 3 of them!" She rants. I watch her carefully,
making sure I catch enough to understand. I think I caught everything. She is
talking fast, but her signs make up the difference. Just let her get it off
her chest..
Finally, she stopped pacing and faced me. Deflating a bit, she tells me,
still signing, "I want to be mad. But, I'm not. I mean, he's never done anything
to me. How do I know what's true, unless, I hear what he has to say?"
What could I tell her? He's her father. She has heard some stuff from Regina
about him and not much else. I can't fill in the blanks, because I know less
than she does. So I signed back, "You don't."
Bay scoffed. "How do you sign and eat at the same time?"
I chuckled. That should be obvious…."Lots of practice." I gloated a
little.
Bay grabbed my sandwich away and took a bite of it. Shrugging, I smiled and
took a drink of my soda.
I'm sorry Daphne got mad at you," she told me. Doesn't matter. Her issue
isn't my problem.
Shrugging it off, I signed and mouthed, "I don't care. She has no right to
judge me."
"Okay," Bay said, handing me the sandwich back. "Things have been kind of
sucky for her lately, and it can't be easy for her, that we're together. And, I
just- I feel kinda bad." Why the hell was she defending her?
I was done talking about Daphne. I asked instead, "What are you going to do
about Angelo?" Bay looked at me, confused. So I signed, "Father."
"Father," Bay repeated. I finger spelled "A…N…G" Before Bay said, "Angelo?
Angelo? Oh, what am I going to do about Angelo?"
I nodded and waited.
"I don't know. Maybe I'm better off just letting this one go," She told me,
signing as well. I shook my head. I knew her better than that.
"We both know that's not going to happen," I signed. Bay's eyebrows
went up.
"Emmett, you think I go looking for trouble?" she asked.
"He is your father. You have to go," I signed. I knew she would never be
happy unless she found out for herself.
Bay decided I was right. She decided to go see Angelo at his hotel. Bay
dropped me at the carwash so Daphne and I could start getting things together
for the fundraiser.
Just before I got out of the car, I signed, "If you need me, text me. If
anything happens, I'll be there as fast as I can."
"I will," she promised. As I walked away, I thought, "Here we go.."
#----------------------
When I got to the hotel, I took some calming breaths. I asked at the front
desk which room Angelo was staying in, and they informed me that he was in the
dining room. Okay, maybe that was better. One on one would just be too weird
right now.
I saw him sitting at a table toward the middle. Good. I approached Angelo
slowly. He looked up and saw me. Smiling, he stood and waited for me.
"You've got 15 minutes," I told him. He nodded and we sat down.
"What do you want to know? I am an open book," Angelo told me.
"How did you know where I was?" I asked the question that was most prominent
in my mind.
"I was in Chicago, on the train after work, looking for something to read,"
he told me. "Someone had left a paper. There it was, "Switched At Birth." I
nearly died. My girls…you. I mean her…"
"It gets confusing," I said cutting him off. Next question. "Okay, so what am
I again exactly? Italian?"
"Italian, French, some Algerian," he said.
"Algerian?" I said, impressed.
"Yeah," he agreed.
"Whoa, so like, I'm Arab? Cool!" I said. I was way more out there than
Daphne!
"We're a little bit of everything," Angelo told me, smiling.
I threw out some French to show him how well I could do. He started speaking
rapid fire French. Holy…!
"Whoa, whoa, whoa….High School French. High School French!" I told him.
"You'll come with me to Paris this Summer? Meet your grandparents, your
cousins. And, Italy…the art in Italy. You are going to love it," he told me
confidently.
I couldn't believe it. He had just met me, and he was already accepting me! I
was so excited, but at the same time….
"Let's just hold on a second," I told him, trying to be realistic.
"I'm just excited. I don't want to waste anymore time," Angelo stated.
I feel the same way…
"You know, I tried calling your mother, but her number was disconnected," he
told me.
"Uh, she and Daphne and Adrianna, they live in our guest house now," I filled
in.
"Adrianna too? Wow, they didn't talk back then," Angelo said, surprise
evident in his voice.
"She's sober. Regina," I told him, wondering if it was the right thing to
say.
"No kidding," Angelo said, shocked.
"So, what happened there? With you and Regina?" I asked, unsure of if I
really wanted to know or not.
"There's too much to tell you in 15 minutes. I need time with you. Real
time," he said.
He wants me! "I want that too," I assured him. "But, I can't do this
in secret. I can't hide it from my parents."
"However you want to do it, we'll do it," Angelo agreed.
Maybe this would work out after all…
#---------------------------
John was waiting when Bay dropped me off. He didn't see me get out of the
car, which I was glad about. As soon as he saw me, he started telling me about
what was going to happen with the cars. How they would go in, and come down the
ramp. He was trying to sign all this as well. I actually was shocked at how well
he was doing. But, also, a lot of it was more charades than anything else.
After he had explained everything, I asked John if there would be a sign for
Carlton. John looked very confused and mimicked me, trying to figure out what I
had signed.
Frustrated, I kept repeating "sign" but John just wasn't getting it. Finally,
he pulled Daphne over.
"I want to know if there will be a sign for Carlton?" I told her. She
repeated it to John.
"A sign?" he asked. I nodded. Finally….geez. "I got a banner, coming
tomorrow," he signed "tomorrow."
"Tomorrow?" I repeated and gave him thumbs up. Good to know.
He said something else, but I only caught the part where he told me to fill
Daphne in. He waved and walked away.
Facing Daphne, I started to tell her what John and I had talked about, but
she cut me off, saying "-dry the cars. I got it," before walking away.
WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?
#-----------------------------------
Angelo and I talked for a while longer. He told me about some of his
childhood, and about family members I had obviously never met.
I told him about my childhood. I didn't mention Emmett to him. I wasn't ready
to share that information just yet. I wasn't sure exactly how he would respond
to my boyfriend being deaf.
Otherwise, I found Angelo very easy to talk to, and I loved his sense of
humor. He knew some funny jokes.
Finally, I told him I wanted to take him home to "officially" meet my
parents. He was all for it, so we hopped in my car.
Please, please, PLEASE….let this go well….
#--------------------------------
What the hell was Daphne's problem now? She had been acting weird all day.
Was she still pissed off about Bay and I being together? Was Daphne really that
childish? Either way, I really didn't care. It was in the open and I was glad. I
could finally be with my girlfriend without second guessing my every move,
worried Daphne or someone else would see us. I knew Daphne was hurt that I
hadn't said anything before now, but really, did it matter that much anymore?
Sure, Bay and I had our "moments." Communication was still a big thing, but
Bay's signing was improving every day. The rate she was going, she would be
fluent in ASL in a few months. She was that dedicated to learning. Now, if only
my mother would give Bay more of a chance….
I saw Daphne by the table we had set up to collect the money. Perfect! She is
writing on her clipboard. I grabbed some stuff and walked over. Now to find out
what Daphne's issue is….
Daphne looks up at my approach and then looks back down at the clipboard
again, basically trying to ignore me. I got her attention again. She looked at
me, irritation on her face.
"Are you honestly mad at me?" I sign.
"No. I'm sorry. Forget it." she signs back dismissively. She turns to walk
away. I grabbed her hand, and pulled her toward the carwash. Time to air the
laundry..
Standing in front of her, I ask, "Tell me what it is? Is it really because
she is not deaf? Or is it because she's…her? I don't want things weird between
us."
This had to be about Bay. It's the only thing that makes any sense. If I
didn't know better, I would swear Daphne was…jealous. Why on Earth would she be
jealous, though?
"I'll get over it! Don't worry." she tells me, looking frustrated. Is that
hurt on her face?
"Tell me." I ask imploringly. I'm getting to the bottom of this one way or
another. I will have the truth! She looks at me with ….fear? Huh?
What she said next, I could honestly say I wasn't prepared for it.
"I…" she starts. Breaking off, she blushes slightly.
I stare at her, willing her to finish.
"I started to think maybe you and me…." she hesitates again. Say WHAT?
Is she freaking serious? Why the hell is this happening now? Now that I moved
on and found Bay, Daphne decides that NOW she likes me…. Holy
hell!
Irritated, I shake my head sharply, telling her, "Don't!" She is not ruining
what I have with Bay!
Apparently, she didn't get the hint. "Even before I knew about you and Bay. I
swear it's not to take you away from her."
UH-HUH! SURE IT ISN'T! Why do I not believe that?
I decide to let her have it. "How can you do this to me?" Why did she have to
pick right NOW to tell me this? Why couldn't it have been 8 years ago, or hell,
even 6 months ago, before I knew Bay even existed?
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything." YA THINK?
By now, I am full out angry! So, I blow up at her. "I've been waiting for you
for 8 years. You had to know that! 8 YEARS!"
At the same time, Daphne is trying to defend herself. "I wish I had realized
it before now, but it took this whole thing happening for me to realize…"
"I've listened as you talked about all those other guys…"
"you're the only one who gets me."
She can't be serious! "So, I'm just some security blanket?"
"I don't have to read lips or teach signs….we know everything about each
other."
I repeat, "So, I'm just some security blanket?" Was I just comfortable to
her? Is that where this is coming from?
"NO! It's our sense of humor, our history." She looks hurt now. "I'm
sorry if this is bad timing but it'd be dishonest to hide it from you."
Why am I leaning toward her? STOP!
"Wouldn't it?" she finishes.
I stare at her for a second. 8 years of feelings boiled to the surface. I
feel her lips under mine. Did I kiss her or did she kiss me? I didn't
know. All I knew was that I have dreamed of this moment for 8 long years. To
finally have Daphne's lips against mine. To feel her in my arms. This is what
you've wanted. It's here, laid out in front of you. Take it!
Suddenly, Bay pops into my head. I break the kiss. As I stare at Daphne, I
realize that I just basically cheated on my girlfriend. Kissing Daphne was
unforgivable. I can't lead Daphne on. Bay is the one who holds my heart now. The
girl I'm falling in love with. Why did I do that? What the hell is the matter
with me?
Pulling back, I slowly shake my head. Daphne's face is confused.
Firmly, I tell her, "I'm with Bay!" and walk away. What the hell was I
just thinking?
#--------------------------------
I pulled up to my house. Angelo got out, clearly impressed. As we walked
toward the Kitchen door, Angelo said, "This place is incredible!"
"Yeah, if you like overrated everything," I muttered. "Okay," I said,
returning my voice to normal, "I'm gonna go inside and tell my parents I invited
you for dinner. That's your cue to come in," I told Angelo. He nodded and waited
by the door. Now if my nerves would just calm down..
Taking a deep breath, I headed inside. My parents were talking about the art
show. Good, I think…
Dad saw me and said, "Hey, honey!"
I waved back and said hesitantly, Hey, guys? Uh- I invited someone for
dinner." My parents looked expectant.
Angelo came in on his cue, smiling. "Hi," he said softly.
Mom flushed and took off the apron she was wearing. "Ha ha, hello!" she said
warmly.
Dad said, "Hi again," to Angelo as well.
I realized Mom hadn't yet met Angelo, so I said, "Mom? This is Angelo
Sorrento."
Angelo took over. "It's so nice to finally meet you. You've done an
incredible job, both of you." Uh-oh!
Dad looked suspicious. Mom was too, but she smiled and said, "Well, thank
you!" A beat later, she said, "I'm sorry. Who are you again?"
Angelo looked at me, confused. Yep, did I forget to mention they have NO
idea who you are?
Moment of truth…. This could go good or bad.
Please let it go good!
Stealing myself for the worst, and hoping it doesn't happen, I said, "Mom,
Dad, This is my father."
Both of my parents were shocked. I didn't blame them. I did kinda drop it on
them unexpectedly. Then, Dad went into full out parent mode.
"What are you doing here?" he asked, his voice tight. Oh no….
"I came to meet Bay," Angelo told him honestly.
"No, I mean here. At our house?" Dad was angry now.
Time to step in. "Well, Angelo was at my art show and.." I started, but Dad
cut me off.
"Sweetie, I understand," he told me before going after Angelo again. "And by
the way, what the hell was that?
Now, mom was really confused. "Wait, you've met him before?"
"Yeah, he said he was some art guy," Dad told her.
Suffice to say, it went down hill fast after that. Mom and Dad were pounding
Angelo with questions. Angelo tried to answer everything. Dad accused Angelo of
lying to his face about who he was. Then I stepped in again.
I told my parents I hadn't been ready to introduce him yet. At the same time,
Angelo was saying he didn't want to cause any trouble.
Dad told me to go to my room. I told him no I wouldn't. Then he told Angelo
to leave. That we would go through "proper channels." I can't believe
this…..I NEED EMMETT NOW!
Angelo tried to tell Dad he didn't need permission to see his own daughter,
but Dad was way past being reasonable. He was in full out "destroyer" mode. Dad
told him he needed to get out.
We argued some more before Angelo asked Dad how he would feel if he just
found out he had a daughter.
Dad's response…. "I did just find out." Great. And now we are back to
Daphne again…. Wonderful.
Angelo tried to reason with Dad, but that wasn't working either. And then
came the curve ball….
Angrily, Dad said to Angelo, "You are not welcome in this house. You are not
welcome in Bay's life. You have nothing to do with her!"
"Dad, he's the reason I exist," I said quietly, suddenly feeling very small.
And so, we were at a standstill.
And guess who showed up at the kitchen door….. Daphne.
Mom tried to get her to leave, but of course, she wouldn't. Daphne kept
asking who Angelo was. Mom wouldn't tell her. Angelo wanted to talk to her as
well, but Dad stepped in again, telling Angelo to leave.
Finally, rather shrilly, Daphne said, "Will someone please answer me? Who is
this?"
Realizing neither parent was going to give her an answer, I signed, "Our
father."
Daphne's eyes widened. Her jaw dropped in shock. She stared at Angelo for a
minute before she raced back out the door.
Dad and Angelo got into another argument, this time about Daphne. Suddenly,
she reappeared, saying "I want to hear it."
Angelo tried talking to Daphne. He told her he didn't know what Regina had
told her, but that the reasons why he left weren't simple. He told her how sorry
he was that he left, and that he was here now to get to know her, and he hoped
he could make it up to her.
Daphne stared at him. I was getting the strong feeling she hadn't understood
what he had said to her. I knew I was right when Angelo said, "You don't
understand a word I'm saying, do you?"
"No, I don't," Daphne said plainly before running toward the guest house.
I can't believe all of that just happened! What the hell was I suppose to
do now?
I ran to my room, slamming the door.
"SOS!" I typed on my phone. But I hesitated on hitting the send button.
Emmett is busy dealing with the carwash. He doesn't need my drama right
now. I cleared my phone and sat on my bed.
This was the worst day of my life…..
#-------------------------------
Later that day, I was back at Carlton getting ready to leave for the day. I'm
still pissed about the whole kiss with Daphne. Should I tell Bay? That
would create a problem, I was sure of it. Bay would undoubtedly get pissed. More
than likely, she would go after Daphne. Would she break up with me?
The truth was, I wasn't sure who initiated the kiss to start with. Was Daphne
the one at fault? Or, was I the one to blame? I was starting to get a headache.
For now, it was best to keep it from Bay. I knew she would ask questions I
didn't want to answer. It's best to keep her in the dark for now….
Out of my peripheral, I saw someone walking toward me. Looking up, I realize
it's Toby and Wilkie coming toward me. What the hell are these two yahoo's doing
at my school?
"Hey, buddy!" says Wilkie.
"Hey, man!" says Toby.
I look around me. They do remember I'm deaf, right?
Over exaggerating my signs, I ask, "Are you guys lost?"
"Yes." says Toby. Charades isn't your game, is it?
"Or no." he continues. Apparently not.
"We're here to see you man." Toby points at me. Kinda got that figured out.
"So, What's up?" I over sign again. Just go away, would you….
"How good is he at reading lips?" Wilkie asks Toby. Sure , insult my
intelligence. That'll win points. I glare at him.
Toby sighs. "Good enough to know you are talking about him right now."
Someone's on the ball. My respect goes up a notch.
I stop watching Tweedle-dee and Tweedle-dum and go back to getting my
backpack in order. From the corner of my eye, I see Toby strumming an invisible
guitar. Hmmmmm….
Now I start paying more attention…
"Saint Louis. And um, we got in using a tape that was made from the
fundraiser that night. Where you played," he says beating imaginary drums. Dude,
wrong rhythm.
"And we're going. We want you to come with us." Toby finished.
"Groupies. Free beer. Road trip. What do ya say?" puts in Wilkie. Jackass…
Did I really want to hang around these 2 yahoo's for 2 to 3 days? Was it
really worth my time?
"Not interested." I sign. Getting on my bike, I rev the engine and take off.
I'll have to tell Bay about the visit I got from her brother.
#--------------------------------
Sitting on my bed, I fumed. How could my parents do that? How could they
treat me like I was a child? I was staring at the picture that Daphne had given
me, the one of a pregnant Regina. Now that I had met Angelo, I was starting to
have a clearer picture of where I come from. That side of me was no longer such
a mystery.
And my parents are trying to take that away from me!
Mom knocked on my now open door. "Can I come in?" she asked softly. Did I
want her too?
"I can't believe you did that," I told her point blank.
Mom had the grace to look embarrassed. "Wait a minute. We are not saying you
can't see him." Really! Sure sounded that way downstairs! "But, there are
right and wrong ways to initiate contact. And that, was totally disrespectful to
me and Dad."
How else was I suppose to do it? Write it on a freaking banner and fly it
over the house?
"Mom, this isn't about you. It's about me." Did you forget that?
"Honey, it's not that simple," Mom said, trying to reason. "We have to
protect you." From my father!
Time for hard facts. Standing up, I stood in front of Mom. "Mom, my entire
life was thrown off course when I was 5 hours old! Everything about me is messed
up." I felt the tears welling and fought to keep them from falling.
"That is not true," Mom denied.
"Yes it is. You know it is," I told her. "There is this whole other me that I
think about every single day. Who was I suppose to be? And, whether you like it
or not, Angelo Sorrento is key to that answer. And, no matter what you or Dad
do, it's not going to stop me from wanting to find out more about him." I knew I
had gotten through to Mom when the tears started.
"Okay," she said simply. Running her hand down my face, she repeated, "okay."
Score 1 for me.
"Can you talk to Dad? And, get him to back off?" I implored. I really needed
someone on my side right now.
"Okay, I'll talk to him. I promise," Mom said, before pulling me into a hug.
After Mom left, I got a text from Emmett. "Busy? Need to talk to you."
"Come on over. Meet me in studio," I sent back.
"Give me 10 minutes. B right over."
Smiling, I headed to my studio. 10 minutes later, I heard a knock before the
door opened and Emmett stepped through. I immediately went up to him and threw
my arms around him. Emmett returned the hug, but didn't kiss me like he usually
did. I thought that was odd, but made no comment.
We sat on the couch. Emmett signed and mouthed, "I had visitors at Carlton
today."
I cocked an eyebrow. I wondered how long it would take them. "Was it
Toby and Wilkie by chance?"
"Yes. They want me to drum at something in St. Louis. Know about it?" he
signed and mouthed slowly.
Know about it? It's all Toby has been talking about for the last few
days. I was sick of hearing about it, truth be told. But, I wasn't going to
ignore Emmett's question.
"It's a festival called "East West Fest." Toby and Wilkie are opening for
"Cold War Kids" but they don't have a drummer. That's why they want you." I told
him slowly, making sure he caught it all.
"I told him I wasn't interested. I don't really hang out with many hearing
people. And, no offense, your brother is not my favorite person in the world,"
Emmett signed and mouthed slowly as well.
"It's okay. I understand," I told him. I couldn't blame him. After the whole
gambling fiasco, and the bruises that Toby had left on my arm, I was surprised
Emmett had even heard Toby out.
We talked for awhile longer. Emmett was not as affectionate as normal. If
fact, he seemed on edge about something. Should I ask?
In the end, I figured if Emmett wanted to talk about what was on his mind, he
would tell me when he was ready.
Emmett took off just before dinner time. He had a big day tomorrow at the
fundraiser. He was happy when I told him I would be there helping out.
Emmett was standing by my studio door getting ready to leave, when Daphne
came down from the guest house. They locked eyes and she looked away, pain on
her face. She can't still be mad that he and I are together?
Emmett kissed me briefly and took off toward his bike. When I got back in the
house, Daphne glared at me. But, there was something else there too. She
looked….guilty.
What on Earth could she feel guilty about? Deciding not to dwell on
it, I instead focused on the fundraiser that would be happening tomorrow.
#----------------------------
After I got home, I sent a text to Bay. "Busy? Need to talk to you."
"Come on over. Meet me in studio," was what I got back.
"Give me 10 minutes. B right over." I wanted to change first.
I got to Bay's house and parked toward the end of the driveway. As I made my
way up the driveway, I looked around for Daphne. Not seeing her, I breathed a
sigh of relief. I was not ready to face her after what had happened this
morning. I was still pissed at myself for doing that. How would I ever get
the nerve up to tell Bay?
Reaching Bay's studio, I knocked before I opened the door and stepped
through. Bay immediately came up to me and threw her arms around me. I returned
the hug, but couldn't kiss her like I always did. I couldn't kiss Bay after I
had kissed Daphne no more than a few hours ago. Bay IS your girlfriend! I
felt like I had betrayed her. The guilt was eating at me.
We sat on the couch. I signed and mouthed, "I had visitors at Carlton today."
Bay cocked an eyebrow. Ah, so she knew something about it…."Was it Toby and
Wilkie by chance?"
"Yes. They want me to drum at something in St. Louis. Know about it?" I
signed and mouthed slowly.
The look on her face said she knew more about it than she probably wanted to.
"It's a festival called "East West Fest." Toby and Wilkie are opening for
"Cold War Kids" but they don't have a drummer. That's why they want you," she
told me slowly, probably making sure I got it all.
"I told him I wasn't interested. I don't really hang out with many hearing
people. And, no offense, your brother is not my favorite person in the world," I
signed and mouthed slowly as well. Please don't take offense to that!
"It's okay. I understand," Bay told me. After the whole gambling fiasco, and
the bruises that Toby had left on her arm, Bay was probably surprised I had even
stopped to listen.
We talked for awhile longer. I knew Bay wanted to cuddle, and normally I was
all for it. Today, though, my head was too full of what had happened with
Daphne. Why are you still thinking about it? You have your gorgeous
girlfriend in front of you!
I decided to take off just before dinner time. Bay told me she was helping
out at the fundraiser. I was very happy to know I would get to see her.
Then, it happened. I was standing by Bay's studio door getting ready to
leave, when Daphne came down from the guest house. We locked eyes and she looked
away, pain on her face. Have I lost my best friend now?
I kissed Bay quickly and headed toward my bike. Tomorrow was gonna be a long
day!
#-----------------------
The next day at the fundraiser, I was helping out with the carwash. Emmett
was busy, so I didn't bother him. Instead, I would bring around stuff that they
all needed. Towels, cleaner, whatever. Emmett and Daphne were cleaning a car
behind me when I dropped off some towels, so I quickly glanced at Emmett. He
looked upset about something. I contemplated going over to him, but decided it
would look strange, since no one really knew yet that we were dating. So, I
started walking toward another group with more towels, when Toby came up behind
me. To say that I was surprised to see him there was an understatement.
Scoffing, I said, "What are you doing here?"
Looking behind him, Toby pointed in Emmett's direction. "Don't they need
help?" he asked innocently.
Ah-ha! Now I'm on to you, Toby! "You think you wash a couple cars and Emmett
will suddenly want to play the festival?" I said, forgetting Toby knew nothing
about Emmett and I.
His eyes widened. "What, he told you?" Toby sounded surprised.
"Yeah," I confirmed. Realizing the cat was out of the bag, I told Toby, "He
and I have been, ah-" Please fill in the blank.
"Dating?" Toby was surprised again. I smiled and nodded. "You and Emmett?
Seriously?" Okay, now you're making me wonder…
"Don't look so freaked out," I said, slightly irritated.
"I'm not. I'm just, you know, taking it all in. I mean, how do you guys
communicate?" he asked me.
How else would I? I signed and spoke, "I'm learning to sign."
Toby said, "Oh, right. Right." Idiot! Looking back at Emmett again, Toby
asked, "So why doesn't he want to go with us?" Are you really that dumb?
"He doesn't usually hang out with hearing people. And, I think the fundraiser
was a one time thing for him," I said point blank.
"That sucks!" Toby whined. "Well, wait. What does that make you then?"
I thought about that for a second. What did that make me? Was I really so
different? Obviously, if Emmett wanted to be with me. Smiling, I told Toby,
"Special."
And then, Wilkie turned up too. "Hey, hey!" he said. Oh, joy…
"Oh, you're here. Didn't figure you were the charitable type," I joked. I
wasn't blind. I knew Wilkie was hot for Daphne. Even Emmett had told me about
the night he went to pick up Daphne, and her shirt was miss buttoned. Didn't
take a genius to figure that one out…
"I've been blessed with so much. I figured I should give back," Wilkie said.
Yeah, and score points with Daphne…
Toby called him out though. "I lied to him, and told him it was a bikini
carwash, so he showed up." That makes much more sense!
Wilkie actually looked affronted. "That hurts, man."
I tossed a wet rag at Wilkie's face. It landed dead on. Toby and I started
laughing.
A little while later, Toby had an idea. He bet Wilkie $20 to go through the
carwash, without a car. Wilkie being Wilkie, he took the bet. Toby and I stood
at the end to make sure he didn't chicken out. Wilkie made a huge show of
entering the wash.
Toby turned to me and said, "Think he'll make it through?"
"Nah, doubt it," I told him.
A few minutes later, Wilkie came running out, soaking wet and shivering. He
looked so ridicules, that Toby and I started laughing all over again.
"Oh, I can't believe he did that," I said, still laughing.
Wilkie came running over to us. Pushing his hair back, he told Toby, "All
right, you said $20 bucks to run through the carwash. Now quit laughing and pay
up!"
Toby was still dying. "You bailed out halfway through the hot wax, man."
"It was like a thousand degrees in there!" Wilkie protested. "I think I lost
an eyebrow."
"How's that "I'll never gamble again" thing going for both of you?" I said,
laughing.
"Awesome," Toby said, giving me a thumbs up. Wilkie was still pestering Toby
for the $20.
Just then, I saw Emmett start to walk by. I had to tell him about this. He
would love it, too. So, I grabbed his arm to stop him.
Emmett looked at me, probably thinking I was nuts. In between laughs, I tried
to explain what had happened.
"Toby," I started. "Oh! What's the sign for bet?" I couldn't honestly
remember, so I finger spelled "bet" and said, "He bet Wilkie 20 bucks that he
wouldn't go through the carwash."
Toby jumped in, telling Emmett he should have seen it. Emmett looks a little
confused. Then, Wilkie decides to jump in. This lasted for a minute, before
Emmett turned and walked away. What the hell?
He only made it a few feet, before I caught up to him. "Hey, What's wrong?" I
asked.
"You didn't know the sign for bet?" he signed back forcefully. Huh?
I was shocked for a second. "I'm sorry, okay. I forgot. I finger spelled it.
what's the big deal?" I asked, signing what I knew.
Emmett looked pissed, and kept walking. What the hell is the problem here?
"Hey," I said, grabbing his arm. "I'm studying my ass off. I'm practicing all
the time. It's a new language. It's hard to pick up in 2 weeks," I said
defensively.
He signed back, "I know!"
"Okay. Why are you picking a fight with me?" What did I miss?
Emmett signed something, but all I got was "You're going drop everything."
I signed back, "Okay. SLOW DOWN." What had he said to me?
Clearly pissed off, he signed, almost insultingly, "YOU ARE GOING TO DROP
THIS. THE WAY YOU DROP EVERYTHING!" Had he been verbally speaking, I think I
would have felt whiplash!
For the first time, I was starting to understand. I had to know if I was
right. With tears in my eyes, I asked, "Why are you doing this?"
Emmett looked down, almost like he was ashamed of his outburst. But then, he
started signing fast. I caught most, but not all, of what he was talking about.
He was tired of reading lips and was tired of working all the time. He was
himself only with other deaf people. He was mad that my family and friends were
hearing, and that would always cause problems for him. He didn't want me
interpreting for him. He ended it with, "That is not me. That will never
be me."
I felt like crying. Was he breaking up with me? And then, it hit me. I
knew where the outburst was coming from. Bracing myself, I signed flawlessly,
"Daphne told you she likes you, didn't she?"
Emmett was breathing heavy. He looked also on the verge of tears. I knew I
was right when Emmett walked away from me. I stared after him.
"What just happened?" I thought numbly to myself.
Emmett….just…walked…away…from…me! After telling me he essentially couldn't be
himself around me and that he didn't think we worked in a relationship, he
freaking walked away. I stood there a few minutes unable to move. I didn't even
notice Toby until he was standing right in front of me. I was numb from shock.
"Bay? What the hell just happened?" asked Toby.
I couldn't do anything but stare. "I think I just lost my boyfriend to
someone else," I whispered.
Toby's eyes narrowed. "Who?"
"Doesn't matter, I knew I didn't stand a chance in his world anyway." Tears
were starting to form in my eyes.
Toby pulled me into a hug. "It's alright, sis. You'll always have me."
"No, it not alright. It will never be alright ever again," I said softly.
"Want me to take you home?" Toby offered.
"Yes," I answered simply. I knew I would never make it home without breaking
down.
Toby dropped me at the house. Thankfully, no one was home. I went up to my
room and slammed the door. I screamed until my throat hurt. I screamed out all
my pain. Then I wept bitterly.
Daphne had won. I knew she would in the end. I just didn't realize how much
it would hurt letting go…..
Night came slowly. I just sat on my bed, staring at the ceiling. Thankfully,
nobody came looking for me. Thank you big brother! I was so exhausted, I
could barely keep my eyes open. I kept seeing Emmett and Daphne in my head. They
were kissing and laughing at me. I felt like a fool. Then I saw Emmett's face
after I said to him, "Daphne told you she likes you, didn't she?" I would never
forget that look.
My mind went into overdrive with thoughts….
"Daphne's been in his heart for 8 years. Why would a couple of weeks with me
make him want me more?"
"You can't sign. Daphne can…."
"I knew the risks and I lost my heart anyway…."
"They have so much more in common than we ever would…"
"I thought he wasn't like Liam or Ty, that he wouldn't break my heart. Should
have known better."
"Daphne's held his heart for 8 years. I can't compete with that."
"He doesn't have to teach Daphne sign. He's probably jumping for joy now. No
more "dummying it down" for the hearing girl."
"I give up. I can't compete. Why did I bother trying?"
I thought of Liam and Ty, two boys who never understood me.
I thought of Emmett, the boy I fell in love with. The boy who would never
know it.
Finally, the exhaustion caught up and I fell asleep, tears dripping onto my
pillow.
#---------------------
The next day at the fundraiser, Daphne avoided me like the plague. She tried
to be as far away from me as possible every chance she got. Why did that bother
me so much? I'm with Bay. I love Bay. But, I love Daphne too. She's my best
friend.
So why is the fact that she is avoiding you making you so angry?
I knew the answer to that, even though I barely wanted to admit it to myself.
That kiss had affected me more than I realized. I was up most of the night,
conflicted.
Bay or Daphne? Bay or Daphne? Bay was the one I wanted to be with, but
even I had to admit that being with Daphne would be simpler.
I was not in a great mood. My mood worsened when Daphne and I were drying the
same car a while later. I looked up and caught her eye. She turned and ran in
the opposite direction. I saw Bay walking away from me, delivering more towels
and rags to people. Surprisingly, Toby and Wilkie both showed up.
Probably still think they can get me to go to the festival with them.
I wouldn't be changing my mind, no matter HOW many cars they cleaned.
A while later, I was walking by the carwash. I see Bay and Toby laughing at
Wilkie. He is soaking wet. What the hell did that idiot do now? I really
didn't care. I tried to walk past, but Bay grabbed my arm. I looked at her
waiting. She kept laughing.
Finally she signs, "Toby," but then she seems to get stuck for a second.
Finally, she says, "What's the sign for bet?" She can't be freaking serious!
Really?
Finger spelling "bet," she continues. All those signing lessons and she
doesn't remember bet?
"He bet Wilkie 20 bucks that he wouldn't go through the carwash," she signs
and speaks, finally finishing her story.
Then Toby and Wilkie decide to jump in. I can barely focus on Bay, and you
two idiots think you are going to do any better?
Enough of this shit! I turn and walk away. I only make it a few feet, when
Bay comes up to me. "What's wrong?" she signed.
Does she not get it? I latch on to the stupidest thing. "You didn't know the
sign for bet?" I signed accusingly.
Bay was shocked for a second. "Sorry. I forgot. I finger spelled it. What's
the big deal?" she signs a few things.
For the first time, I was regretting dating a hearing girl. This was getting
to be too much. I tried to walk away again, but Bay grabbed me again.
"I'm studying - ass off. I'm practicing all - time. It's - new language. It's
hard - pick up - 2 weeks," was all I caught. She signed a few, but I was too
irritated.
I shot back, "I know!"
"Why are you picking a fight with me?" I don't know why.
Everything that had happened over the last couple of days came to the
surface. All my frustration, about Daphne, Bay's and my relationship, and the
guilt I felt about kissing Daphne flooded me.
"You're going to drop this, the way you drop everything." What the hell is
the matter with you? Stop!
Bay signed, "Okay. SLOW DOWN." That one statement sent me over the
edge. So, I exploded.
Pissed off, I signed insultingly slow, "YOU ARE GOING TO DROP THIS. THE
WAY YOU DROP EVERYTHING!"
Bay was hurt. "Why are you doing this?" she said, with tears in her eyes.
Tell her…tell her now! All of my frustration boiled up, and every pent up
feeling inside of me began to seep out in my words.
"I'm tired of reading lips and only catching 30% of what people are saying,
but pretending I'm getting more. I don't want to be working all the time. I can
only be myself with people who speak my language. And, even if you learn, your
friends are hearing, your family is hearing. And I will always be lost,
wondering what the joke is. Or worst, you'll be stuck interpreting for me.
Speaking for me. And, that is not me. That will never be me!" I am breathing
heavy now, feeling like an ass.
Bay's eyes are red. I'm so sorry Bay! Why did I say all that to you? What
the hell am I trying to prove? I hesitated, wanting to pull her into my
arms. But then.......
"Daphne told you she likes you, didn't she?" Bay signed perfectly, surprising
me. Of all the things to sign with 100% accuracy......Ah, hell…
I wanted to apologize, but would she forgive me? I had just told my
girlfriend that I didn't feel like I belonged in her world. The worst part was,
I really didn't feel that way. I don't know why I said what I did. Defeated, I
walked away. I knew words wouldn't work now. You're a coward….
I walked past Daphne on the way to my bike. Suddenly I was angry at her. I
was angry because she had just cost me the girl I love. I ignored her, and got
on my bike. Tears threatened. Revving the engine, I took off.
I went to the park. Two weeks. We dated for just two weeks. But, I knew from
the day I met her, that I wanted Bay. She was the one. And now, I've lost her
forever.
I love you, Bay Kennish. From the beginning, until the end…
Damn you, Daphne!
#---------------------------
Toby and I had some nice talks. He had been surprisingly nice to me these
last couple of days. We didn't talk about Daphne or Emmett. That subject was too
painful right now.
Instead, we talked about his music, Angelo, my art. Anything to keep my mind
off of those two…
I didn't even want to think about the two of them together. Those thoughts
hurt the most. But, they were still there.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized how much his speech made
sense. He was miserable in my world. No one supported him, except me. Even if
this hadn't happened now, it would have happened eventually. We would get tired
of trying. Maybe this was for the best….
Nights were hard. I've cried myself to sleep the last couple nights. I would
dream about them together and wake up in a cold sweat.
God, will this pain ever go away?
#----------------------
A couple days after the disaster at the carwash, I was at school. I was
having a hard time concentrating. I felt like a freaking zombie. I couldn't
sleep at night. I just kept seeing Bay's face. Why didn't I stop myself from
saying those horrible things to her? I felt so alone. In any other
situation, I would talk to Bay. But, obviously, that isn't possible now. Daphne
and my mom are a huge NO! I didn't want to hear any shit from either of them at
this point. Even my dad wouldn't be any help. Without Bay, I am truly alone in
this. I lost count of how many times I picked up my phone to text her, begging
her forgiveness. I even thought about camping outside of her house, but decided
that if John found me there, he would probably have me arrested for breaking his
daughter's heart.
God, I effed up!
I had just zipped my backpack and was heading to class, when I felt someone
tap my shoulder. I turned and saw Toby. What the hell is he doing here?
"Hey," he says.
Cut to the chase. "I'm not going to your festival."
Of course, he has no idea what I'm saying. Bay would have known….
To my surprise, though, he signs perfectly, "I don't know what you're
saying."
Not making this easy for you. "Which is why I'm not going to your festival."
Toby sighs and signs, "I'm here because of Bay." He signed "Bay," but did
this weird hair flipping motion. Just what the hell is that suppose to
be?
Scoffing, I ask, "That's your sign for Bay?"
Toby looks irritated. Get to your point, would ya! What he told me, I
couldn't believe.
"She likes you. But now, she's sad. Don't treat my sister like that," he
signed and spoke.
That took guts. He was right. I had hurt her badly. He knew it....I knew it.
She didn't deserve any of that. I was angry at Daphne, and took it out on Bay.
Did I still have a chance? Could I make this right? Was it even possible to make
it right?
The only problem I had with his signs was "sister." Moron signed "gun".
Grabbing his hand, I held up my own, making the sign for gun.
"This is gun" I mouthed to him.
"Gun? Oh, gun." he looked confused for a second. Then it hit him.
Dropping one finger, I show him. Grabbing his other hand, I showed him the
proper way to sign "sister."
He repeated it and then signed "Thanks."
It was kind of ironic. Daphne was his sister by blood, yet Bay was the sister
of his heart. He came here to champion for Bay. I owed him now.
Making a split second decision, I mouthed and signed slowly, "I'll play at
the festival with you. I owe you that much."
Toby smiled once he got what I told him. "Awesome," he signed.
I excused myself and headed toward my bike. I had to see Bay, now! I had to
get her back. She means the world to me, and I need her in my life.
Please don't let it be too late….
#-------------------------
A few days after the car wash disaster, I was walking to class at Buckner. I
just wanted to go home and bury myself under my covers, like when I was little,
and would have a nightmare. I didn't talk to anyone. I just wanted to be left
alone with my misery. Without Emmett, my life has become a monotony. I get up,
go to school, go home, go to bed. I no longer want to paint, as it reminds me of
my time with Emmett. I purposely avoid the billboard where he put up my art.
That memory really is too painful.
I also avoid Daphne. I can't face her now. She won. She knows she won. I
don't want the graphic blow by blow of her gloating conquest. I also know I will
die if I see her and Emmett doing all the things he and I did. Those thoughts
turn my stomach and make me sick.
I knew that I was completely and deeply in love with Emmett. I also knew that
now I had to bury those feelings as far down as they would go. I would never
tell him. Why suffer humiliation twice? I didn't want Daphne having more
ammunition to use. I was hurt enough already. If she knew how I felt about
Emmett….
So wrapped up in my thoughts was I, that it takes me a moment to realize
footsteps are rapidly approaching me. Good, maybe they'll run me over and
make me think of another kind of pain…
I felt a hand on my shoulder. A familiar hand. My eyes widened
slightly, and I turned, seeing the last person I ever expected to see
again…Emmett. Instantly, my heart seized, and I stopped breathing.
"Can I talk to you?" he signs. No! I'm not ready for this. I'm not ready
to say goodbye to you…
"What are you doing here?" I ask. Are you here to rub it in that you finally
got the girl you've always wanted? Are you going to gloat now?
"I shouldn't have…" he starts, but I cut him off. Can't take anymore pain.
Must retreat…
"No, it's fine. You and Daphne. I get it, I can't compete with that. Just
don't make this harder for me than it is already." Just let me walk away
before I breakdown and cry.
I turned away, intent on escape. But, Emmett grabbed my shoulder again. He
starts signing, but I have one more thing I need to say.
"Just because I always have some snappy comeback, doesn't mean that I don't
break easily." Too late anyway…I'm already broken.
I couldn't believe what he signed next…
"I've never been comfortable around hearing people. I haven't been around
them much. But, with you, it was different. From the beginning, you weren't
hearing or deaf. You were just Bay." He never saw me as different from him?
"The truth is, it would be easier if I could go find a deaf Bay. But, I
don't want a deaf Bay…."
I could only stare at him. Was he really saying what I thought he was?
And then..
"I…just…want…you." Emmett said OUT LOUD...
The tears that had been welling in my eyes dripped down. Emmett spoke
to me. I pulled him into my arms, trembling with emotion. I felt his arms
encircle me. I sent a silent "thank you" upward.
I was complete again. I had Emmett back.
After we pulled apart, Emmett leaned back in and kissed me deeply. I put all
my heart and soul into that kiss. I wouldn't vocalize how I felt, but I would
show it in my kiss.
"Forever," Emmett signed after he stopped kissing me.
"Forever," I agreed.
#---------------------
I pulled up in front of Buckner a short while later. Please let me find
Bay! I entered the back courtyard and looked around. I nearly jumped for joy
when I saw her several yards away. I raced toward her. Please, just let her hear
me out…
Running up behind her, I tap Bay's shoulder. She turns to look at me. Her
face shows surprise. But, she also looks like she has lost her zest for living.
I want to kick myself, because I know I'm the cause of her pain. I have to make
her forgive me.
"Can I talk to you?" I sign. Please, hear me out, before you send me
away…
Her face registers shock. "What are you doing here?" Trying to get back
the girl I love!
"I shouldn't have…." I start, but Bay interrupts me. I can see the tears
gathering in her eyes. I shouldn't have been such an ass. I shouldn't have
kissed Daphne. I should never have broken your heart.
"No, it's okay. It's fine. You and Daphne. I get it. I can't compete with
that. Just don't make this harder for me than it is already," she says, turning
to walk away again. No, I'm not going to lose you!
I realized something during her speech. I realized that I didn't care if Bay
could sign or not. I didn't care that I was deaf and she was hearing. I didn't
care that our relationship would always be difficult in some way or other.
What I did care about was that Bay thought I wanted Daphne. That she thought
she wasn't good enough to be with me. I cared that she was hurting as much as
me.
In that moment, I realized that I was honestly and truly, deeply in love with
Bay. I would never want another girl. Bay was it for me. She was the one I
wanted to spend my life with. She was the one I would someday marry. She was the
only one I wanted…forever.
I grabbed her shoulder again. I started to tell her all of this, but Bay
still had something to say.
"Just because I always have some snappy comeback, doesn't mean that I don't
break easily."
Truth time….bare truth. She needs to know she is the one for me. The only
one, ever.
"I've never been comfortable…." I start. Bay is looking at me confused.
Slower. This time make sure she understands everything. Try again…
"I've never been comfortable around hearing people. I haven't been around
them much." Truth is, the only hearing people I've ever been around are
Regina, and Bay and her family. "But, with you, it was different. From the
beginning, you weren't hearing or deaf. You were just Bay." You were the one,
right from the beginning. "The truth is, it would be easier if I could go
find a deaf Bay. But, I don't want a deaf Bay…."
Bay is staring at me, tears glistening in her eyes. I feel the tears welling
in my own eyes. I have to make her understand….
"I…just…want…you." I spoke out loud.
Her breath caught and the tears leaked from her eyes. I hadn't lied before. I
never spoke, not since I was 8 years old. Just for Bay, to prove I meant exactly
what I said, I spoke.
I knew I was forgiven when Bay pulled me into her arms. I felt her tremble
against me. Wrapping my arms around her, I sent a silent "thank you" upward,
toward the sky . Closing my eyes, I knew I was complete again. I had Bay back. I
was never going to lose her again.
After we pulled apart, I leaned back in and kissed Bay deeply. I put all my
heart and soul into that kiss. I wouldn't vocalize how I felt, but I would show
it in my kiss.
"Forever," I signed after I stopped kissing her.
"Forever," she agreed.
#---------------------------
Later that day, I started working on a surprise for Emmett. He told me he had
finally agreed to be the drummer for "Guitar Face." He also told me why
he had agreed to be the drummer. I would always be grateful to my brother
for what he did. I also had a new level of respect for him. But, I won't tell
Toby that!
So grateful in fact, that I even volunteered "The Thing" for them to take
their equipment down. The only rule I had was, "Wilkie doesn't drive my car!"
Toby readily agreed. I thought he would never stop hugging me.
Daphne was still avoiding me. I didn't know if Emmett had told her what had
happened or not. I certainly wouldn't. I never wanted her to know how close I
came to losing it all.
I still couldn't believe that Emmett had spoken to me. I was shocked, to put
it mildly. That he would speak, for me told me just how deep his
feelings run. I knew he would never have spoken otherwise. I felt honored
and privileged to have witnessed it.
I learned from our brief time apart. Communication was our greatest asset and
our most difficult obstacle. As long as we were honest with each other, we would
work out. Emmett and I couldn't afford to have secrets. Our relationship could
only work with honesty.
I would never lose Emmett again. I was sure of it!
#-----------------------------
Later that day, I started getting ready for the road trip I would be on with
Toby and Wilkie. I owed Toby more than he knew. The least I could do was be his
drummer. I told Bay that I had finally agreed to go with them. She beamed, so I
knew I had made the right choice. I also told her about why I had agreed.
Bay was shocked that her brother had come to me and basically kicked me into
action. I had a new level of respect for Toby now. But, I won't ever tell him!
I couldn't believe it when Bay volunteered her car for our drive down. Her
rule about Wilkie not driving was freaking hysterical. I couldn't blame her on
that front. I wouldn't even trust him with my bike.
I didn't tell Daphne about anything that had happened. Ever since the kiss,
she seemed standoffish. Was our friendship ruined now? Because I had chosen Bay,
did I lose my best friend?
Don't get me wrong. I would chose Bay over and over again. I just felt
terrible about what happened with Daphne. I knew that kiss would hang over our
heads. I just hoped, down the road, my decision not to tell Bay doesn't come
back to bite me in the ass….
I knew Bay had been shocked when I spoke to her. I hope she understands just
how deep my feelings run. I actually started looking into Speech Therapy
classes. I wanted to communicate with my girlfriend.
I learned from our brief time apart. Communication was our greatest asset and
our most difficult obstacle. Honesty was key to our long term happiness. We
couldn't afford to have secrets. Well, I had 1 secret, but I knew telling Bay
would only hurt her more. So, I would lie by omission.
I would never lose Bay again. I was sure of it!
#-----------------------------
A couple days later, Daphne and I were standing in the driveway, watching
Toby and Wilkie load the U-Haul attached to the back of my car. Emmett hadn't
arrived yet. He was probably having a hard time getting away from his mother…
"Bay, thanks for letting us use your car," Toby said, loading up the drum set
on the U-Haul. Geez, how much shit do you need?
"Yeah, sure. I thought you were playing, like, 4 songs?" I asked
suspiciously.
"Hey, go big or go home," Toby cracked. Even Daphne got a chuckle out of that
one.
"You sure you don't want to be our roadie? Last chance," Wilkie said,
flirting with Daphne. She looked at Toby, confused.
"R-o-a-d-i-e," Toby finger spelled. "You know, beer fueled guys who are
muscular. You know, who move stuff and check out groupies," he signed rather
comically.
"Oh! Tempting, but no," she told Wilkie. Right answer, Daphne!
By this time, Emmett was pulling in the driveway. He parked his bike behind
me, and removed his helmet. That boy has some sexy helmet hair!
Wilkie said, "There he is!" and then tried to sign, "We are going to rock!"
Emmett just nodded and held up his hand in the "rock out" sign. Toby also did
the same.
As Emmett came around the front of his bike, I grabbed his surprise and
walked toward him. He smiled at my approach. Daphne, however, walked toward
Toby. Whatever…
Signing, I told Emmett, "Hey. So, I, um have something for you."
His face lit up. "For me?" Emmett queried.
I handed him the box. He smiled again before pulling it open. Reaching
inside, he pulled out a drum front that had "Guitar Face" painted on it. Emmett
looked shocked and excited at the same time.
"It's for the front of your drum kit," I signed unnecessarily. I wanted to
show off my skills a little.
"I know," Emmett signed. Then, in front of Daphne and the boys, Emmett leaned
in and kissed me. I couldn't help the smile that came to my face. He was showing
them that we are officially a couple. Not that we hadn't been already. But now,
we no longer had to hide it. I wanted to screech with glee.
After Emmett pulled away, Toby asked to see the drum front. We agreed and I
handed it to Toby. I also pulled out stickers that I had made as well and gave
them to both Toby and Wilkie. They loved the stickers.
"Well, alright gentlemen. The roads a-callin," Wilkie chirped. Toby seconded
that notion. "Let's go!"
I took the drum front back from Toby and placed it back in the box. After all
the work I put into it, I wasn't letting them ruin it. I saw Emmett and Daphne
signing to each other. I didn't pay attention to what they were saying though.
In a way, I was still a little jealous of their relationship, but at the same
time, I had a better one. And, it would just keep getting better. I saw them
hug, before Emmett came over and patted my back. Emmett climbed in the back
seat. Wonder if we'll ever use that back seat?
Wilkie turned around, and he and Emmett did the fist bump. I couldn't not
laugh at that. We waved them off. Daphne shouted, "Yeah, Rock on!" Just as they
hit the road, I heard Wilkie yell, "Road Trip!" I hope Emmett can survive 3 days
with them….
After the boys were out of our sight, I signed, "And the world will never be
the same." Daphne scoffed, and started to walk away. I know I shouldn't, but I
have to ask….
I grabbed her arm and said, "Hey. Uh, I'm just checking. Is everything okay?"
I needed to know.
"Fine," she answered cryptically. Okay, little more info would be
nice.
"Cool, cause I know it's been like, one harsh thing after another lately," I
said, trying to be optimistic.
"In a way, it's been helpful. I know what I want," Daphne said. Alrighty
then…
"Okay. Hey, that's good," I told her. Something was bugging me though.
Something I hoped I was wrong about. "What is that, exactly?" Please let me be
wrong!
"I'm not giving up this time. You didn't want me to be with Liam, so I broke
up with him," she stated. God, is she still stuck on that? Then she said
what I was dreading. "But, I'm not giving up on Emmett."
Considering that battle lines are now being drawn, I'd say I'm being pretty
calm about this whole thing. And, just why has Daphne decided to stop signing to
me now? She always had before? Did she think that by stopping, I would give up?
Not on your life!
"I was checking in about Angelo," I told her. I was taken aback by her open
hostility. This is not going to end well.
"I'm not okay with that either." Wow, who is this bitch and where did the
real Daphne go?
"Oh, okay. But, he's my dad, so…"
Daphne shrugged and walked away.
I'm so screwed!
#------------------------------
It took me forever to get out of the house. Mom kept asking me question after
question. I finally told her that they would leave without me if I didn't get
there soon, and then she would have to drive me to St. Louis.
2 minutes later, I was out the door.
As I pulled into the Kennish driveway several minutes later, I saw Toby
mimicking something to Daphne. Okay then. We really have to work on his
signing….
Wilkie saw me and started talking, but all I caught was the ending when he
signed, "We rock." I did the Rock out sign and got off my bike. As I came around
the front, Bay approached me with a flat box. I smiled at her and waited. Daphne
stepped away. Was she still upset? Oh, well….I focused on Bay.
Signing, she told me, "So, I, um have something for you."
Oh, a present! "For me?" I asked excitedly.
Bay handed me the box. I smiled again before pulling it open. Reaching
inside, I pulled out a drum front that had "Guitar Face" painted on it. Oh my
god! This is freaking awesome.
"It's for the front of your drum kit," Bay signed. Already knew that, but I
loved seeing her sign anyway!
"I know," I replied. In front of Daphne and the boys, I leaned in and kissed
my girlfriend. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught a small sour look from
Daphne. Sorry, but I wasn't going to hide my feelings anymore. I wanted everyone
to know that Bay Kennish is my girlfriend. I was proving that we are a couple.
After I pulled away, Toby wanted to see the drum front. We agreed and Bay
handed it to Toby. She pulled some stickers out of her pocket and handed them
off to Wilkie. I couldn't tell if she said anything to Toby though, as her back
was to me. Finally, Wilkie started talking again. I couldn't tell what he said,
but he and Toby headed for the car. Okay, guess we're leaving now.
Daphne tapped my arm. "Be safe. And don't let these clowns do anything
stupid," Daphne advised.
I looked at Toby and Wilkie. They were giving each other high fives. Them?
Stupid? Nah!
Daphne and I hugged. I was glad to see that she finally seemed to be over the
whole thing from the carwash. I would hate it if that ruined our friendship. I
tapped Bay on the back, before getting in the backseat.
Wilkie turned and fist bumped me. This was going to be a long 3 days!
As we were pulling out, I saw Daphne do the sign for "Rock On!" and had to
laugh. I looked at Bay, committing her face to my memory. That would have to
tide me over until we got back home.
Things are definitely looking up!
#--------